What kind of dance do single people do on Valentine's Day?
The Independance!
I'm fondue you, it's true
“What would you get if you ate the Christmas decorations? Tinselitis.”
"You crack me up."
We make a great pear
Why does Santa Claus go down the chimney on Christmas Eve? Because it soot's him Why are Christmas trees so fond of the past? Because the present's beneath them.
There’s no reason to wine about you.
“If you’re lucky this Christmas, Santa Claus will grace you with his presents.”
"For peep's sake."
"Egg-ceedingly good, wouldn't you say?"
It’s snow joke.
You are spud-tacular.
What do you call a fake Irish stone? A shamrock.
This year for Valentine's day I got my wife the ace of hearts and packets of corn flour, rice flour and self raising flour
She wasn't happy. Apparently it wasn't what she meant when she said she just wanted a card and flowers.
What’s the best dessert to serve at a St. Patrick’s Day party?
Paddy cake!
“Did you know that Father Christmas has a daughter? Her name is Mary Christmas.”
Why did the Easter Bunny go to the doctor?
It was time for his annual eggzam.
Sip, sip, horray!
Up to snow good.
Snow on and snow forth.
What do you call Santa living at the South Pole? A lost clause.
Deja brew all over again.
Keep calm and leprech-on.
What do you call an elf who runs away from Santa's Workshop? A rebel without a Claus!
It’s the most wine-derful time of the year.
Irish you were beer.
This may be corny, but you are a-maize-ing.
These decorations are tree-mendous.
Saw what I thought was a large dog coloring Easter eggs.
Turned out to be a dyer wolf.
I’m Dublin down on what I said before.
“Deck the Halls with Bows on Collies.”
Getting lucked up on St. Patrick’s Day.
Why was Santa's little helper depressed? Because he had low elf esteem.
I call the shots.
What did the arsonist do on Valentine's day?
He met his match.
Easter is grammatically incorrect.
We should say more east.
Be careful this Easter
There is a lot of basket cases out there.
"Some bunny loves you."
People are always after me lucky charms.
What genre of music do elves love to listen to? Wrap.
I’m a clover, not a fighter.
Let’s take an elfie.
"There's no bunny like you."
Who’s your paddy?
Why did St. Patrick drive the snakes out of Ireland?
It was too expensive to fly and too long to walk.
What is Santa's favorite breakfast food? Snow-flakes.
"I would hop to the end of the world for you."
"You round me out." — High Card Band
It takes one to snow one.
We’ve made a jig mistake, don’t you a-green?