What's the name of the machine the ancient greeks used to calculate how best to fight hybrid monsters?
The antichimera mechanism.
What do you call four Spanish guys in a capsized boat?
Quatro sinko.
What was Michael Jackson's favorite Spanish food?
Jamon!
Whats a good Spanish sports channel?
ESBieN.
France – it’s just a oui bit different!
I'm a supervillain from Italy, I have the power to infect people with deadly diseases.
It’s-a-me, Malario.
Why should you never eat the fish in France?
Because it's poisson.
There’s so much to do here so I’m never Bordeaux-ed.
What do you call a small mosque in Spain?
A mosquito!
Son: I was really Hungary and I ate the whole Turkey. There is only Greece left.
Me: I couldn’t Bolivia!
What do you call a Jamaican man born in Italy?
Reggae-Toni.
How do cats say goodbye in Italy?
Miao.
The Leaning Tower of Pisa is in Italy
So it’s italicized!
What is the most popular flower in France?
Croissanthemums.
I read Reims of info before I got here, but nothing can prepare you for how beautiful this place is.
Other people had drugs in school, but I brought Greek cheeses.
That way I could have math and feta cheese.
A few years ago, I had a job translating pre-Classical Greek literature into Braille.
It feels like ancient history.
How does Mr. Bean introduce himself in Spain?
Soy Bean.
What do you call the generation of people that migrated from Italy?
Genitalia.
The 70s/80s aesthetic has recently become pretty popular in France.
They say it has a certain Gen X sais quoi.
What is the call of a Spanish speaking owl?
Quién...Quién.
My friend learned Spanish by jotting sentences repeatedly...
He used wrote learning.
I used to be a personal driver in France
But now I have nothing to chauffeur it.
My uncle moved to Spain to sing on stage by night and sell UPVC windows by day. He changed his name to....
Enrique Doubleglazius.
It’s time to say Versailles to France.
Brother: "My friend John is in Greece studying abroad."
My Dad: "What's her name?"
Where to Bees go to party in Spain?
Ibiza.
I bought a 400 year-old chair from Italy,
but as soon as I sat on it, it baroque.
Why did everyone want to go to Italy during World War II?
They were Fascistanating.
People are always amazed by the skilled tattoo artists in Spain
Nobody expects the Spanish ink precision.
Whilst holidaying in France I saw a group of mushrooms performing Queen covers.
I said 'You're brilliant, what's the band called?'
They replied 'We are the Champignons."
Living in france must be hard
I mean, 100 dollars is only a cent.
If you don’t have a lot of figurines from Ancient Greek mythology, I can give you a mini tour.
How do you get in contact with a Greek architect?
You column.
What happens when you go to the bathroom in France?
European!
Another cheese factory in France exploded...
I Camembert to hear this joke again!
What do you call a Greek love song?
An Aphro-ditty.
After hearing about my history major, my dad said, “You should go visit Italy in late August.Then you can witness The Fall of Rome."
Did you know that the Greek god Chronos was in the Mafia?
He was the Don of Time itself!
Me and my friend were going to a costume party. He told me he was coming as a small island off the coast of Italy.
I said don’t be Sicily.
Why do people in Greece not wake up until noon?
Because Dawn is tough on greece.
German tourist visits France.
Guy at the Airport: "Nationality?"
German Dude: "German".
Airport Guy: "Occupation?"
German Dude: "Nein, nein, Only Vacation".
My collection of Swiss watches was stolen in Spain.
Adios Omegas.
What do you call the Greek version of Spider-Man?
Pita Parker.
I visited Spain and couldn't stop looking at the architecture
It was very Moorish.
Did you hear about the watchmaker who is half Spanish and half Irish?
His name is Juan O'Clock.
A mummified macaroni pizza was uncovered in Italy today.
The man who uncovered it says "It's a pizza of our pasta."
I checked my phone bill after my trip to Italy, and it said I spent DCXII dollars.
I must have left on Data Roman.
Did you know there was a Jedi from Italy who was really strict about diets?
His name was Only One Cannoli.
I was at a thrift store and the guy ahead of me was purchasing an antique urn made in Greece
He asked the cashier if she knew how much a Greek urns.