Why did the Clydesdale give the pony a glass of water?
Because he was a little horse!
Why does the river have problems remembering things?
Because she is becoming sea nile.
What do you call a tooth in a glass full of water?
A one molar solution.
How do you know if an ant is a boy or a girl?
If you toss it in the water and it sinks, it’s a girl. If the ant floats, it’s a buoyant.
If Smart water were actually smart…
Then why did it get bottled?
Why did the ocean leave the party early?
She was getting really tide.
What goes up when rain starts to come down?
Umbrellas.
A parishioner at my church broke into the holy water tank and splashed some on his infant daughter, saying, "your are hereby baptized!"
That's just not rite.
Why don’t you see an ocean in school?
They just can’t wade through all that homework.
What did the beaver say after she slipped in water?
Dam it.
When does it start to rain money?
When there is change in the weather.
Why are oceans so meticulous?
They like to be pacific.
What do you call two days of rain in a row in Seattle?
The weekend.
Why does water never laugh at jokes?
It isn’t a fan of dry humor.
HIJKLMNO is the formula for water
H to O.
Looking out at the water, a father explains why the ice breaks up in the spring.
The changing sea son.
Why is a river an amazing roommate?
He just likes to go with the flow.
Which weighs less; butane, gasoline or water?
Butane, because it's lighter fluid.
The weatherman said it might get a bit drizzly outside.
You can expect a Lil’ Wayne.
What did one body of water say to the other?
"Do you sea what I sea?"
Why do poets always write about the sea?
They just can’t fathom her depths.
What is worse than when it is raining buckets?
Hailing taxis.
Did you ever hear the joke about the three holes in the ground?
Well, well, well.
What did the sink say to the water faucet?
You’re a real drip.
I’m going to start a YouTube channel where I critique bottled water...
It’s an untapped market.
What do you call water that is good for you?
Well water.
What do you call dangerous amounts of precipitation?
A rain of terror.
What did the fish say when it ran into the wall?
Dam.
How do the Skywalkers like their bath water?
Luke-warm.
What do you get when you cross a rabbit with a water hose?
Hare spray.
You can tell an ant’s gender by putting it in the water.
If it sinks, it’s a girl. If it floats, it’s a buoyant.
It's really easy to learn white water kayaking
You just go with the flow.
What did the bottled water tell the spy?
The names bond, Hydrogen bond.
If your canoe turns upside down in the water, you can wear it on your head.
Because it’s capsized.
How did the raindrop ask another raindrop on a date?
He asked her “Water you doing tonight?”
How do you make holy water?
Make sure to boil the hell out of it.
Why did the lake date the river?
He heard that she had a bubbly personality.
How do you make holy water?
By boiling the hell out of it.
When you mix a salt and water, you get a solution. When you mix a salt and battery, you get arrested.
My friend couldn't afford to pay his water bill.
So I sent him a “get well soon” card.
What did Snoop Dog need to get an umbrella?
Fo’ Drizzle.
R.I.P boiled water. You will be mist
What did one ocean say to another?
Nothing, it just waved.
What is the ocean’s favorite lullaby?
Roe, Roe, Roe Your Boat.
Why does the river never get lost?
She always finds the right pathwave.
Did you hear about the ocean and sea having a baby?
It was a buoy!
Why did the ocean break up with the pond?
She thought he was too shallow.
Does a water bed become bouncier when you fill it up with spring water?
My wife first agreed to a date after I gave her a bottle of tonic water.
I Schwepped her off her feet.