I have a buddy who was recently hit by a bus, while promoting pedestrian safety.The surgeons had to replace all the joints in his left leg with metal.
I think it's safe to say he can appreciate the iron knee
Is the city bus running on time? No, it’s running on diesel.
Passenger: One ticket to New York, please.
Bus Driver: By way of Buffalo?
Passenger: No, by bus!
Why can't buses make friends? Because they only pick up strangers!
I heard someone complain about the bus being too crowded, it was a 'bus-load' of people!
Why did the bus driver eat a burger? He wanted to 'bus-t' his energy!
Why did the bus driver take a long break? He needed a wheel-y good rest!
Why did the bus stop in the middle of the street? It saw a zebra crossing.
Why did the bus driver take a break? He needed to 'stop' and refuel!
Why did the bus driver laugh? He was having a 'wheely' good time!
How do eels travel across the seafloor? By Octo-bus.
I hopped on the bus yesterday afternoon. After a few minutes, the driver asked me to sit down like everyone else
What’s the hardest part about working as a bus driver? Everyone’s talking behind your back.
Where do bus drivers eat their lunches? In a traffic jam.
Bus ticket inspectors: You’ve really got to hand it to them.
What did the bus say to the frog? Hop on.
Why did the bus driver quit his job? It was driving him mad.
What happens when you run in front of a bus?
You get tired.
What happens when you run behind a bus?
You get exhausted.
What are the benefits of city buses using green fuel? They’ll always be on thyme.
What superhero takes public transportation to get around? Bus Lightyear.
Why did the bus driver go to jail? He was 'wheely' breaking the law!
When I asked the bus driver for directions, it was a 'bus stop' service!
What’s the difference between a school bus driver and a winter cold? One knows all the stops, and the other stops the nose.
Why did the bus driver stay out all night? He was 'driving' around town!
The bus driver was so friendly and nice, it was a 'joy ride'!
Why was the bus driver so confused? He was 'bus-t' in traffic!
Why was the bus musician so excited? He just got a 'ride-ing' ovation!