Split

There was an Old Man of Nepaul,
From his horse had a terrible fall;
But, though split quite in two,
By some very strong glue,
They mended that Man of Nepaul.
What did the right hemisphere say to the left hemisphere when they could not agree on anything?
Let's split.
Why was the pear by himself? Because the banana split.
How was Rome split in two? With a pair of Caesars.
A recent finding by statisticians shows the average human has one breast and one testicle.
The world’s population is split sort of evenly between men and women, making the average human part male, part female, and a complete pain to shop for.
When the first nuclear bomb was detonated all the neutrons were sad.
Because their parents had just split.
What did the banana do when he saw a monkey? The banana split!
Why did the banana go to the hairdressers? Because it had split ends!
What is the easiest way to make a banana split? Cut it in half.
Why did Samson try to avoid arguing with Delilah?
He didn’t want to split hairs.
What did the banana do when he saw the monkey?
The banana split.
In a conversation between one pin and another, one said, “Let us never split.”
What's the greatest problem facing Poland?
The four-ten split.
How do you split the ocean in half?
With a sea-saw.
Why did Samson try to avoid arguing with Delilah?
He didn’t want to split hairs.