Significant

What do you call a mathematician's spouse?
Their significant figure.
How did the beaver introduce his wife? This is my significant otter.
Why is a baby showing the top of its head during labor a significant event?
Because that’s the baby’s crowning achievement.
If at first you don't succeed, try twice more so your failure is statistically significant.
A woman is on trial for beating her significant other with a guitar. “First offender?” the judge asked.
“No” she replied. “First a Gibson , then a Fender”.
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