A circus manager is busy tiding is office when a scrawny little guy walks in the door. He walks over to the manager, and he says "Are you the boss here?"
The manager says "Yeah. What do you want?"
He says "I'd like to join the circus. I got an act."
The guy says "Oh, yeah? Well, let me see what it is."
So this little guy goes over to the center pole, and he starts climbing up the pole. And he goes all the way up. He climbs up and up and up. He goes all the way up to the very peak of the big top.
And he looks down, and he takes a deep breath, and he leaps off, and he starts flapping his arms.
And he starts flying! And he flies all around the big top! He goes all the way around the place. He goes around the center pole. He goes loop-de-loop through the trapezes.
Then he gets all the way up, and he takes a nosedive right down to the ground, flapping his arms like mad. And he lands right next to the boss. And he says "Well, what do ya think?"
"That's all you do? Says the boss disdainfully, "Bird imitations?"
I bought a parrot but he has a foul mouth. I let him loose so that he could fly South. But he came home again. This proves that I can't win. He says the F word two hundred times a day. He offends everybody and drives them away. Nobody will take this bird even though I offer to pay them. I'm going out of my mind, it looks like I'm stuck with him. I have the only parrot on Earth that's a sinner. If he doesn't shut up, he's going to be my dinner.
A funny old bird is a pelican. His beak can hold more than his belican. Food for a week He can hold in his beak, But I don’t know how the helican.
(Dixon Lanier Merritt)
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