What do you call a computer that sings? A-Dell
What do you call the new girl at the bank? The Nutella!
Where do cows go on December 31st?
A moo year’s eve party.
What do you call a pile of kittens a meowntain
What did the beach say to the tide when it came in?
Long time, no sea.
Which is the building is the largest? The library because it has the most stories.
What is the best day to go to the beach? Sunday, of course!
Did you hear about the carrot detective? He got to the root of every case.
Where do snowmen keep their money? In snow banks.
Did you hear the score in the game between the ocean and the beach? It’s tide.
What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back?
A stick.
How do you make holy water? Boil the hell out of it!
I’m sick of martial arts.
I have kung flu.
Why did the cross-eyed teacher lose her job? Because she couldn't control her pupils?
What's taken before you get it? Your picture.
What do you call a frozen dog? A pupsicle.
Why do we never tell jokes about pizza?
They’re too cheesy.
What do you call a dentist in the army? A drill sergeant
Why did the robber take a bath? Because he wanted to make a clean getaway.
What do you call a computer floating in the ocean? A Dell Rolling in the Deep.
What garment are you most likely to spot a house in?
Address
Why did the daddy rabbit go to the barber?
He had a lot of little hares.
How do spiders communicate? Through the World Wide Web.
What do you call two fat people having a chat? A heavy discussion.
Why is justice best served cold?
Because if it were warm, it would be justwater.
Why is it so windy inside a stadium?
There are hundreds of fans.
Who do fish always know how much they weigh? Because they have their own scales.
Why did the giraffe get bad grades? He had his head in the clouds.
What Do You Call A Bear With No Teeth? A Gummy Bear
Did you hear about the Italian chef that died? He pasta way.
How do you make a tissue dance? Put a bogey in it.
Why did the boy tiptoe past the medicine cabinet? He didn't want to wake the sleeping pills!
What is brown and sticky?
A stick!
Why did the boy eat his homework? Because his teacher said it was a piece of cake!
What did the femur say to the patella? I kneed you.
Who cleans the bottom of the ocean? A Mer-Maid
Q: Why did the tree go to the dentist?
A: To get a root canal.
What's the first bet that most people make in their lives? the alpha bet
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet? SUPPLIES!
What kind of button won't unbutton? A bellybutton!
What has one horn and gives milk?
A milk truck.
Why did the banana go to the Doctor? Because it was not peeling well
What word looks the same backwards and upside down? Swims
What do you call a three-footed aardvark? a yardvark!
What kind of nut doesn’t like money?
Cash ew.
Why do sharks swim in saltwater?
Because pepper water makes them sneeze!
What do you call a Bee who is having a bad hair day? A Frisbee.
What is an astronaut's favorite place on a computer? The Space bar!
What do you call a sleeping bull?
A bulldozer!
Why do birds fly south for the winter? Its easier than walking!
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