The opposite of isolate is...
yousoearly.
What do you call two fat people having a chat? A heavy discussion.
What do you call a musician with problems? a trebled man.
What gets wetter the more it dries? A towel.
What did the judge say to the dentist? Do you swear to pull the tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth.
What dog keeps the best time? A watch dog.
What did the father say whilst teaching his kid to tie his shoelaces?
Knot bad
Did you hear the joke about the roof? Never mind, it's over your head!
What do you call a snowman with a six pack? An abdominal snowman.
Why do watermelons have fancy weddings? Because they cantaloupe.
What is brown and has a head and a tail but no legs? A penny.
What sound do porcupines make when they kiss? Ouch
What did the nut say when it was chasing the other nut?
I'm a cashew!
What is it called when a cat wins a dog show? A CAT-HAS-TROPHY!
Why did the man lose his job at the orange juice factory? He couldn't concentrate!
What kind of shoes do private investigators wear?
Sneak-ers.
Why did the computer break up with the internet? There was no "Connection".
Q: What did one tonsil say to the other tonsil?
A: I hear the doctor is taking us out tonight!
Did you hear about the shampoo shortage in Jamaica? It's dread-full.
Why did the chicken cross the playground?
To get to the other slide.
Why is England the wettest country? Because the queen has reigned there for years!
Why did the barber win the race? Because he took a short cut.
Knock, knock
Who’s There?
Annie
Annie Who?
Annie thing you can do, I can do better.
What do you call an illegally parked frog? Toad.
How do crazy people go through the forest? They take the psycho path.
Why did the birdie go to the hospital? To get a tweetment.
Why should you take a pencil to bed? To draw the curtains!
Why did the picture go to jail? Because it was framed.
Why do golfers wear two pairs of pants? In case they get a hole in one!
What do you get when you cross fish and an elephant? Swimming trunks. Where do bees go to the bathroom? At the BP station!
What streets do ghosts haunt? Dead ends!
What did one raindrop say to the other? Two's company, three's a cloud
How do you repair a broken tomato? Tomato Paste!
Can February March? No. But April May.
Why did the girl bring lipstick and eye shadow to school? She had a make-up exam!
What Do You Call A Bear With No Teeth? A Gummy Bear
What kind of shoes do all spies wear? Sneakers.
What do you call a magician on a plane? A flying sorcerer!
What do prisoners use to call each other? Cell phones.
What do you get if you a cross a card game with a typhoon? Bridge over troubled water.
What did one aspiring wig say to the other aspiring wig? I wanna get a head!
What is it called when a cat wins a dog show? A CAT-HAS-TROPHY! How do you make a tissue dance? Put a little boogey in it!
Did you hear about the limo driver who went 25 years without a customer? All that time and nothing to chauffeur it.
What do cats eat for breakfast?
Mice krispies.
What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer!
Why do birds fly south for the winter? Its easier than walking!
What’s the most expensive kind of fish?
A gold fish.
Why was the weightlifter upset?
She worked with dumbbells.
What’s a snake’s strongest subject in school?
Hiss-tory.
What did the triangle say to the circle? Your pointless!
Go to BabaMail
