What kind of lunch do moms never prepare in the morning?
Their own.
What do you get when you cross Speedy Gonzales with a country singer? Arriba McEntire.
Who goes to the bathroom in the middle of a party? A party pooper.
What has one horn and gives milk? A milk truck.
What did the femur say to the patella? I kneed you.
Why did the man put his money in the freezer? He wanted cold hard cash!
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet? SUPPLIES!
Knock, knock
Who’s There?
Annie
Annie Who?
Annie thing you can do, I can do better.
Q: How can you tell if an elephant has been in your refrigerator?
By the footprints in the butter!
What did one plate say to the other? Dinners on me
What do you call a musician with problems? a trebled man.
Who cleans the bottom of the ocean? A Mer-Maid
Did you hear about the kidnapping? He woke up.
Why did the cross-eyed teacher lose her job? Because she couldn't control her pupils?
Why did Goofy put a clock under his desk? Because he wanted to work over-time!
What scares a caterpillar?
A dog-erpillar!
What did the snowman ask the other snowman?
Do you smell carrots?
Did you hear about the carrot detective? He got to the root of every case.
What do you get when you cross a cow and a duck? A. Milk and quackers!
What is the best day to go to the beach? Sunday, of course!
What is a tree's favorite drink? Root beer!
Why did the man lose his job at the orange juice factory? He couldn't concentrate!
What do you call a computer that sings? A-Dell
Why did the boy eat his homework? Because his teacher said it was a piece of cake!
What bow can't be tied? A rainbow!
Why are elephants so wrinkled?
Because they take too long to iron!
What do you call a cow with a twitch? Beef Jerky.
What do you call a magician on a plane? A flying sorcerer!
Why did the two 4's skip lunch? They already 8 (ate).
What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer!
What did the triangle say to the circle? Your pointless!
Why can’t you ever tell a joke around glass?
It could crack up.
What did a sign say outside the pet shop? Buy 1 dog get 1 flea!
What’s Thanos’ favorite app to talk to friends?
Snap chat.
What goes through towns, up & over hills, but doesn't move? The road!
How do you communicate with a fish? Drop him a line!
What Do You Call A Bear With No Teeth? A Gummy Bear
What has one head, one foot and four legs? A Bed
Did you hear about the party a little boy had for his sisters barbie dolls? A. It was a Barbie-
Why can't you give Elsa a balloon? Because she will Let it go.
What kind of crackers do firemen like in their soup? Firecrackers!
If Mississippi bought Virginia a New Jersey, what would Delaware? Idaho... Alaska!
What did one math book say to the other?
I’ve got so many problems.
What do you get when you cross Sonic The Hedgehog and Curious George? 2 Fast 2 Curious
What did the blanket say to the bed? Don't worry, I've got you covered!
Why was the weightlifter upset?
She worked with dumbbells.
What does the Lone Ranger say when he takes out the garbage? To the dump, to the dump, to the dump dump dump.
What do you get when you cross fish and an elephant? Swimming trunks. Where do bees go to the bathroom? At the BP station!
What do you call a European Bigfoot?
Bigmeter.
What is the difference between a school teacher and a train? The teacher says spit your gum out and the train says "chew chew chew".
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