What do you call a computer floating in the ocean? A Dell Rolling in the Deep.
Teacher: Use a sentence that starts with "I"
Bobby: I is...
Teacher: No, Bobby. You should say "I am", never "I is".
Bobby: "I am the 9th letter of the alphabet."
How do you know that carrots are good for your eyesight? Have you ever seen a rabbit wearing glasses?
What did the femur say to the patella? I kneed you.
Q: Has your tooth stopped hurting yet?
A: I don't know, the dentist kept it.
Who goes to the bathroom in the middle of a party? A party pooper.
What belongs to you but others use more? Your name
Why did the giraffe get bad grades? He had his head in the clouds.
What does a nosey pepper do? Gets jalapeno business!
Why did the God of Thunder need to stretch his muscles so much when he was a kid?
He was a little Thor.
What has one horn and gives milk?
A milk truck.
Why was the math book sad? Because it had too many problems.
Why did the birdie go to the hospital? To get a tweetment.
Why were the teacher's eyes crossed? She couldn't control her pupils!
What do you call an elephant that doesn't matter? An irrelephant.
What runs but can't walk? The faucet!
How did the farmer mend his pants? With cabbage patches!
Did you hear about the two bed bugs who met in the mattress? They got married in the spring.
What was the seal's favorite subject in school?
ART ART ART!
How did the baby tell her mom that she had a wet diaper?
She sent her a pee-mail.
What did the painter say to the wall? One more crack like that and I'll plaster you!
Why is it so windy inside a stadium?
There are hundreds of fans.
Did you hear about the race between the lettuce and the tomato? The lettuce was a "head" and the tomato was trying to "ketchup"!
Did you hear about the astronaut who stepped on chewing gum? He got stuck in Orbit.
What goes through towns, up & over hills, but doesn't move? The road!
Why did the tomato turn red? It saw the salad dressing!
What kind of shoes do private investigators wear?
Sneak-ers.
Why should you take a pencil to bed? To draw the curtains!
What streets do ghosts haunt? Dead ends!
Why are some fish at the bottom of the ocean? Because they dropped out of school!
Where do sheep go to get haircuts? To the Baa Baa shop!
Question: What is the oldest animal?
Answer: The Zebra, it's still in black and white!
.
What three candies can you find in every school? Nerds, DumDums, and smarties.
Why did the chicken cross the road? It was playing crossy road.
Why did the scientist go to the tanning salon? Because he was a paleontologist.
What word looks the same backwards and upside down? Swims
Why did Harry Potter throw away all his old potions?
They were past their hexpiration date!
What do you get when you cross fish and an elephant? Swimming trunks. Where do bees go to the bathroom? At the BP station!
Why was there thunder and lightning in the lab? The scientists were brainstorming!
Have you ever tried to eat a clock? It's very time consuming.
Learning how to collect trash wasn’t hard.
I just picked it up as I went along.
What has one horn and gives milk? A milk truck.
What washes up on very small beaches? Microwaves!
Why is justice best served cold?
Because if it were warm, it would be justwater.
Why do golfers wear two pairs of pants? In case they get a hole in one!
What did the policeman say to his tummy?
Freeze. You’re under a vest.
Why is England the wettest country? Because the queen has reigned there for years!
What did the digital watch say to his grandfather? Look grandpa no hands!
Which is the building is the largest? The library because it has the most stories.
Why does a hummingbird hum? It doesn't know the words!
Go to BabaMail
