What’s a bigamist?
It’s what Italians call a thick fog.
What's a king's favorite kind of precipitation?
Hail!
Knock Knock?
Who's there?
Hurricane
Hurricane who?
Hurry! Cane you jog away from the storm?
What’s the difference between a horse and wet weather?
One reigns up and the other rains down.
There's a basic difference between weather and climate: you can't weather a tree, but you can definitely climate.
What do you call a storm that doesn't come to fruition?
A mist opportunity!
The main difference between the weather and a horse is that one rains down while the other is reined up.
My glasses may be fogged up, but don’t worry I’ll be fine.
I’m optimistic!
Q: What’s the fastest way to make a skeleton?
A: Put a leper in a wind tunnel
Mother always knows best. But when winter comes around, Mother Nature snows best.
I over boiled some venison broth earlier.
It was deerly mist.
I tried to catch the fog.
But I mist.
Why was fog kicked off the football team? He mist a field goal.
Humpty Dumpty had a terrible summer, but he sure had a great fall.
Why are people in big cities in Spain always dry?
Because the rain in Spain falls mainly on the plain.
The winds of change started raining silver, copper, and gold coins.
Does all this rain make you want an ark?
I Noah guy.
What did one raindrop say to the other raindrop?
“My plop is bigger than your plop.”
You can't blame anyone if you fall in your driveway due to snowy weather...
Because that's your own asphalt.
Yesterday’s weather forecast predicted freezing rain. However, it turned out to be quite an ice day.
I'm trying to break the ice, but you just keep giving me the cold shoulder.
My neighbour always thinks he knows more about the weather than me
The guy is a real snow it all.
Q: What is the opposite of a cold front?
A: A warm back
What does a tornado wear under his clothes? Thunderwear!
Due to bad weather, I won't be attending the Meteorology Convention.
I'm gonna take a rain-check.
What do you call a dinosaur that got stuck in the rain?
A driplodocus.
With the nice warm weather last weekend, a neighbor was enthusiastically diggin' in the dirt planting his garden!
He was so excited about it, he wet his plants.
Nowadays, people drought the accuracy of weather men because the climatic patterns are so unpredictable.
Why do you never see owls being affectionate in the rain? It's too wet to woo.
What was one raindrop overheard saying to another? Two's company, three's a cloud.
It was pretty foggy outside today.
I shot an arrow in the air, and it stuck.
I'm trying to think of a weather pun, but my mind's kinda cloudy now.
Q: Why does it smell bad when you destroy fans?
A: Because you’re breaking wind.
Q: What did the wind turbine say to the engineer after he fixed him?
A: I’m a big fan of your work!
When is it raining money? Whenever there's 'change' in the weather.
The wind is following a new workout program. It’s called air conditioning.
Because it was so foggy at my father’s funeral, he was buried in the wrong plot.
It was a grave mist-stake.
When it rains chickens and ducks, the best description for the weather is foul weather.
Q: Why is there so much wind inside a sports arena?
A: Because of all the fans.
Q: How is hurricane season like Christmas?
A: At some point, there’s going to be a tree inside your house.
There was news of a snowstorm. It arrived white on time.
What should you do if it starts raining cats and dogs?
Please seek shelters.
What do you call a baby owl stuck in the rain?
A moist owlette.
Whenever someone wishes me to say "Happy Winter," it always leaves me cold.
A man went to buy long underwear cause the weather was getting cold. The cashier asked " How long would you like them"
"From march to September", said the man.
Many people think that when warm droplets of water in the air are rapidly cooled it forms fog.
But it’s actually a common mist-conception.
What do you get if you come fourth in the National Weatherman Awards? A precipitation trophy.
Q: What did the tree say to the wind?
A: Leaf me alone
Did you hear of the story of the tornado? There is a twist at the end.
What do you call dangerous precipitation?
A rain of terror!