Old Norse cuisine is simply not to my Viking.
How does a Viking show the amount of raiding and pillaging that they do at the same time?
They use a Sven Diagram.
How can you tell if you're at a classy Viking restaurant?
They have Valhallet parking
Was Henry VI a ViKing?
Who succeeded the Vikings?
The Z-kings
When a ship or Vikings suddenly vanishes
There's a disturbance in the Norse
Why do vikings have barcodes on their ships?
Its so they can scan-de-navien
Why do companies all around the world fear Vikings?
Because of their skills in hacking
What did the Viking boss say to his band of misbehaving marauders?
It's either my way or Norway!
A viking adds symbols to an axe he has just made ...
" Oh no iv runed it"
What do you call a Viking soldier's trusty steed?
A horse in the force of the Norse, of course.
Where do Viking warrior scrabble champions go when they die?
Vowel-halla
How do Vikings get each other's attention?
They ValHolla!
What stories did Vikings tell their children?
Norsery Rhymes
It might take a village to raise a child...
but it only takes a viking to raze a village.
Did the Vikings believe in reincarnation?
That's a re-Thorical question.
What's a Vikings favourite dance?
The Loki cokey.
What do you call a Swedish cycling group?
Viking Biking
What was the Vikings favorite song while invading England ?
Heathen flow by Pearl Jam
What did one Viking war paint say to the other?
Poly, you're a Thane.
What do you tell the nobles of Scandinavia whenever you're leaving their house?
Viking.
What does a Muslim Viking say at the movie theater?
Valhalla Snackbar!
Did you hear about the viking who hit his thumb with a hammer and bit his tongue?
It was Thor.
A Viking walked into a bar.
The bartender asked, Why the long ship?
What do you call a weary Viking conqueror?
Bluetooth low energy
Why can't Vikings fans eat cereal? Because they choke before they ever reach the bowl.
There's this video game about an FBI psychologist hunting a Viking Angel of Death....
I believe it's named Valkyrie's Profile.
Why was the viking boxer loved so much
He ragna"rocked" the house
Vikings joke
Why do West Virginia residences love the Vikings?
They catch theilens from their cousins.
What kind of car does a viking drive?
A fjord
A man goes into a Chinese restaurant and sees people dressed like vikings
"Excuse me, ladies and gentleman. I am a well traveled man and the atmosphere of my excursions must be perfect. I must kindly ask you to leave."
A big, muscular man dressed in Viking armor walked up to the man and said
"Norway"
What do you call a Viking who is really good at basketball?
a Vallhalla Balla.
What is a Vikings favourite letter?
Well obviously it's the C!
What do you call a viking cemetary?
A grey fjord.
Did you hear about the viking cannibal?
He had a Swede-tooth.
Why did the teacher use the evolution of Thor in viking mythology to teach both literature and Northern European history in her class?
She wanted to demonstrate using a Meta-Thor.
What did Dead Viking say to Voluptuous Valkyrie?
Valhallo there.
What's the difference between a Viking and that one Bond movie where he's in space?
One's *Moonraker*, the other's a rune maker.
What do you call a viking who is attracted to both genders?
Biking
What did the Viking chieftain say when asked about his motivation?
"I'm in it for the longhall."
What are the Vikings favorite drink?
Mini Sodas
What do you call a group of penniless Viking grave diggers?
The poor norsemen of the necropolis.
Where did the Viking buy his guitar?
Nordstrom's
Why did the Vikings not have high doorknobs?
Because of Loki.
Don't send our invitations to a viking themed wedding until the date is set in stone
Or they'll be runed
What do you call a Viking cat call?
Valholla
Norwegian archeologists have uncovered the very first Viking parenting book.
The title, translated into modern language, is *It Takes a Pillage*.
How was the viking party?
Pretty Loki.
What is the most popular console with the vikings?
The axe-box
What do Vikings call the people that cut their hair?
Barberians.