What did Dead Viking say to Voluptuous Valkyrie?
Valhallo there.
What are the Vikings favorite drink?
Mini Sodas
What did a viking said to the other after a dad joke?
Aesir what you did there.
Why did the Vikings sail to England in longboats?
It was too far to swim!
Why can't Vikings fans eat cereal? Because they choke before they ever reach the bowl.
What do you call a Swedish cycling group?
Viking Biking
Wanna hear a joke about Vikings?
Never mind, there's Norway you'd laugh at it.
Did you hear about the viking who hit his thumb with a hammer and bit his tongue?
It was Thor.
Where do southern Viking descendants go after death?
Y'allhalla.
What's the difference between a Viking and that one Bond movie where he's in space?
One's *Moonraker*, the other's a rune maker.
What do you call a viking who is attracted to both genders?
Biking
Where do Vikings go when they get old?
The Norsing home.
What's a Vikings favourite dance?
The Loki cokey.
Vikings aren't afraid of death.
They know they'll be Bjorn again.
Vikings joke
Why do West Virginia residences love the Vikings?
They catch theilens from their cousins.
My friends and I are starting a disco group.
We'll dress as a Viking, a Mongol, a Caribbean pirate, a Bedouin raider, and a Spanish conquistador.
We call ourselves: The Pillage People.
Where do Viking warrior scrabble champions go when they die?
Vowel-halla
What do you call a Viking cat call?
Valholla
Don't send our invitations to a viking themed wedding until the date is set in stone
Or they'll be runed
What do you call a Viking who's been bitten by a vampire?
Norseferatu.
What do Vikings call the people that cut their hair?
Barberians.
How does a Viking show the amount of raiding and pillaging that they do at the same time?
They use a Sven Diagram.
Norwegian archeologists have uncovered the very first Viking parenting book.
The title, translated into modern language, is *It Takes a Pillage*.
Roman soldiers are trained.
But Vikings are Bjorn.
What do you call a weary Viking conqueror?
Bluetooth low energy
Where did the Viking buy his guitar?
Nordstrom's
What do you call a Viking soldier's trusty steed?
A horse in the force of the Norse, of course.
A Viking walked into a bar.
The bartender asked, Why the long ship?
What do you call a Viking who is really good at basketball?
a Vallhalla Balla.
What did the Viking chieftain say when asked about his motivation?
"I'm in it for the longhall."
What do you tell the nobles of Scandinavia whenever you're leaving their house?
Viking.
One night, a Viking called Rudolph the red was looking out of his window when he suddenly said, "It's going to rain."
His wife asked, "How do you know?"
"Because Rudolph the red knows rain, dear."
How do Vikings get each other's attention?
They ValHolla!
What stories did Vikings tell their children?
Norsery Rhymes
What is a Vikings favourite letter?
Well obviously it's the C!
What do you call a vegetarian Viking?
Norvegan.
What did one Viking war paint say to the other?
Poly, you're a Thane.
How can you tell if you're at a classy Viking restaurant?
They have Valhallet parking
What is the most popular console with the vikings?
The axe-box
Did the Vikings believe in reincarnation?
That's a re-Thorical question.
What is a Viking's favorite music?
Ragnarock.
What does a Muslim Viking say at the movie theater?
Valhalla Snackbar!
It might take a village to raise a child...
but it only takes a viking to raze a village.
When a ship or Vikings suddenly vanishes
There's a disturbance in the Norse
Did you hear about the Viking who was reincarnated?
He was Bjorn again.