A viking adds symbols to an axe he has just made ...
" Oh no iv runed it"
What did the Viking chieftain say when asked about his motivation?
"I'm in it for the longhall."
One night, a Viking called Rudolph the red was looking out of his window when he suddenly said, "It's going to rain."
His wife asked, "How do you know?"
"Because Rudolph the red knows rain, dear."
What are the Vikings favorite drink?
Mini Sodas
What do you call a Viking who's been bitten by a vampire?
Norseferatu.
The Vikings had an initiative tradition where a child had to participate in a raid to become a full man
... as they say, it takes a pillage to raise a child.
Don't send our invitations to a viking themed wedding until the date is set in stone
Or they'll be runed
Vikings aren't afraid of death.
They know they'll be Bjorn again.
What do you call a viking cemetary?
A grey fjord.
What's a Vikings favourite dance?
The Loki cokey.
What do you call a Viking cat call?
Valholla
My friends and I are starting a disco group.
We'll dress as a Viking, a Mongol, a Caribbean pirate, a Bedouin raider, and a Spanish conquistador.
We call ourselves: The Pillage People.
Vikings joke
Why do West Virginia residences love the Vikings?
They catch theilens from their cousins.
How do Vikings get each other's attention?
They ValHolla!
Where do southern Viking descendants go after death?
Y'allhalla.
Where do Vikings go when they get old?
The Norsing home.
Did the Vikings believe in reincarnation?
That's a re-Thorical question.
It might take a village to raise a child...
but it only takes a viking to raze a village.
What do you call a viking who is attracted to both genders?
Biking
What do you call a Viking who is really good at basketball?
a Vallhalla Balla.
What was the Vikings favorite song while invading England ?
Heathen flow by Pearl Jam
What do you call a group of penniless Viking grave diggers?
The poor norsemen of the necropolis.
A Viking walked into a bar.
The bartender asked, Why the long ship?
What do Vikings call the people that cut their hair?
Barberians.
What do you call a vegetarian Viking?
Norvegan.
What kind of car does a viking drive?
A fjord
Why was the viking boxer loved so much
He ragna"rocked" the house
The Vikings had an initiative tradition where a child had to participate in a raid to become a full man.
As they say, it takes a pillage to raise a child.
How does a Viking show the amount of raiding and pillaging that they do at the same time?
They use a Sven Diagram.
How was the viking party?
Pretty Loki.
A man goes into a Chinese restaurant and sees people dressed like vikings
"Excuse me, ladies and gentleman. I am a well traveled man and the atmosphere of my excursions must be perfect. I must kindly ask you to leave."
A big, muscular man dressed in Viking armor walked up to the man and said
"Norway"
What is a Viking's favorite music?
Ragnarock.
What is a Vikings favourite letter?
Well obviously it's the C!
Who succeeded the Vikings?
The Z-kings
Did you hear about the Viking who was reincarnated?
He was Bjorn again.
When a ship or Vikings suddenly vanishes
There's a disturbance in the Norse
Old Norse cuisine is simply not to my Viking.
What is the most popular console with the vikings?
The axe-box
When the Vikings discovered America, what did they name it?
Norse America.
What do you call a weary Viking conqueror?
Bluetooth low energy
Why did the Vikings not have high doorknobs?
Because of Loki.
Wanna hear a joke about Vikings?
Never mind, there's Norway you'd laugh at it.
Did you hear about the viking who hit his thumb with a hammer and bit his tongue?
It was Thor.
Roman soldiers are trained.
But Vikings are Bjorn.
What did a viking said to the other after a dad joke?
Aesir what you did there.
What does a Muslim Viking say at the movie theater?
Valhalla Snackbar!
Why did the Vikings sail to England in longboats?
It was too far to swim!
What did the Viking boss say to his band of misbehaving marauders?
It's either my way or Norway!
What do you call a Swedish cycling group?
Viking Biking
Vikings weren't exactly the best at drinking contests.
They were quite MEADiocre.