How was the viking party?
Pretty Loki.
What does vikings call english villages?
Chopping centers.
What is a Vikings favourite letter?
Well obviously it's the C!
Where does a Viking keep their baby?
In the Norsery."
A Viking walked into a bar.
The bartender asked, Why the long ship?
A man goes into a Chinese restaurant and sees people dressed like vikings
"Excuse me, ladies and gentleman. I am a well traveled man and the atmosphere of my excursions must be perfect. I must kindly ask you to leave."
A big, muscular man dressed in Viking armor walked up to the man and said
"Norway"
What stories did Vikings tell their children?
Norsery Rhymes
Where do Vikings go when they get old?
The Norsing home.
One night, a Viking called Rudolph the red was looking out of his window when he suddenly said, "It's going to rain."
His wife asked, "How do you know?"
"Because Rudolph the red knows rain, dear."
What is a Viking's favorite music?
Ragnarock.
What do you call a vegetarian Viking?
Norvegan.
A viking adds symbols to an axe he has just made ...
" Oh no iv runed it"
It might take a village to raise a child...
but it only takes a viking to raze a village.
What did the Viking chieftain say when asked about his motivation?
"I'm in it for the longhall."
Where did the Viking buy his guitar?
Nordstrom's
How do Vikings get each other's attention?
They ValHolla!
What do you call a Viking soldier's trusty steed?
A horse in the force of the Norse, of course.
Where do Viking warrior scrabble champions go when they die?
Vowel-halla
Why did the Vikings not have high doorknobs?
Because of Loki.
The Vikings had an initiative tradition where a child had to participate in a raid to become a full man
... as they say, it takes a pillage to raise a child.
When the Vikings discovered America, what did they name it?
Norse America.
Why can't Vikings fans eat cereal? Because they choke before they ever reach the bowl.
What do you call a Viking cat call?
Valholla
My girlfriend said if I don't stop my obsession with Viking culture she'll fight me to the death.
"Jokes on you," I said. "If I die in battle, I'll go straight to Valhalla."
Did the Vikings believe in reincarnation?
That's a re-Thorical question.
What are the Vikings favorite drink?
Mini Sodas
How do you communicate with the spirit of a Viking warrior?
With a Nor-Ouija board.
What do you call a Swedish cycling group?
Viking Biking
How can you tell if you're at a classy Viking restaurant?
They have Valhallet parking
What's a Vikings favourite dance?
The Loki cokey.
What did a viking said to the other after a dad joke?
Aesir what you did there.
What did one Viking war paint say to the other?
Poly, you're a Thane.
What kind of car does a viking drive?
A fjord
Why were the Vikings such good sailors?
You can lead a Norse to water but you can't make him sink.
What do Vikings call the people that cut their hair?
Barberians.
Why are Scandinavian women so hot?
The Vikings didn't bring back the ugly ones.
What do you call a Viking who's been bitten by a vampire?
Norseferatu.
What do you call a group of penniless Viking grave diggers?
The poor norsemen of the necropolis.
Don't send our invitations to a viking themed wedding until the date is set in stone
Or they'll be runed
What do you call a weary Viking conqueror?
Bluetooth low energy
Why do vikings have barcodes on their ships?
Its so they can scan-de-navien
What was the Vikings favorite song while invading England ?
Heathen flow by Pearl Jam
Vikings weren't exactly the best at drinking contests.
They were quite MEADiocre.
What do you call a viking who is attracted to both genders?
Biking
Was Henry VI a ViKing?
Why was the viking boxer loved so much
He ragna"rocked" the house
Did you hear about the viking cannibal?
He had a Swede-tooth.
Who succeeded the Vikings?
The Z-kings
Did you hear about the viking who hit his thumb with a hammer and bit his tongue?
It was Thor.
Vikings joke
Why do West Virginia residences love the Vikings?
They catch theilens from their cousins.