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Tour Jokes

Family Puns
Once a year, I take my family on a tour of various nuclear facilities.
While my kids like it, my wife says it’s just a power trip.
Saxophone Puns
Why do blues musicians tour the most in the summer? So they can visit all their kids.
Funny Birthday Poems
It’s your birthday, there is no cure,
Cakes and candles, you must endure,
Quick and painless, let me assure,
A tiny chance, you will be mature,
With this crowd, usually secure,
Random fun, with results obscure,
Liquids we drink, definitely pure,
Goofy friends, minds we tour,
Hilarious birthday, that’s for sure.

(Martin Dejnicki)
France Puns
What does the Tour de France and Amsterdam have in common?
They both have a bunch of people on drugs riding around on bikes.
Greece Puns
If you don’t have a lot of figurines from Ancient Greek mythology, I can give you a mini tour.
Nose Puns
A quadriplegic man became famous playing beautiful piano classics with only his nose, ears, chin, and forehead.
Before going on stage to perform, his tour manager would say, "Alright John. It's time to face the music."
Tennis Puns
Native Americans used to have their own professional tennis tournaments, and provided free housing to players from other tribes. They called it the A Tee Pee Tour. (No disrespect to Native Americans!)
Cycling Pick Up Lines
I Tour de Francy you.
Italy Puns
Took a tour of Pisa, Italy...
Tour guide said “Hello, my name is Eileen.”
Hiking Pick Up Lines
Girl, you are the spark that lights my fire.
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Come on, I’ll give you a tour of my tent...