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Pound Jokes

Meat Puns
What is the most affordable type of meat? Deer, it is always under a buck a pound.
Skeleton Puns
What is a 2000 pound skeleton called
A skeleTon.
Monkey Puns
Where does a 2,000 pound gorilla sit?
Anywhere it wants to.
Gorilla Puns
What do you feed a 700 pound gorilla?
Just give him anything he wants and then run.
What do you feed a 700 pound gorilla?
Just give him anything he wants and then run.
Tree Puns
What weighs more: a pound of logs or a pound of leaves? They weigh the same.
Halloween Puns
For Halloween, one of my sons dressed up as the clown from IT, and another son as a Twitter hashtag. They asked me my opinion...
I said "Penny wise, pound foolish"
Funny Work Quotes
“It’s just a job. Grass grows, birds fly, waves pound the sand. I beat people up.”- Muhammad Ali