Commit Jokes

Where do you send turtles who commit crimes?
To the shell-block.
Turtles that commit crime are sent to the shell-block.
Let’s commit the perfect crime together.
I’ll steal your heart and you can steal mine.
What do you call it when a raven marries a crow? A conspiracy to commit to murder.
“I don’t like to commit myself about heaven and hell — you see, I have friends in both places."
— Mark Twain
Where are neurons put in jail when they commit a crime?
A nerve cell.
What would be one of the worst crimes to commit if you were a sheep living in the medieval times?
Muttiny
What would be one of the worst crimes to commit if you were a sheep living in the medieval times?
Muttiny
"I have no plants in my house. They won't live for me. Some of them don't even wait to die, they commit suicide."
- Jerry Seinfeld
The only crime I will ever commit is stealing your heart.
Let's commit the perfect crime, I'll steal your heart and you'll steal mine.