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venus Jokes

venus Jokes and more.
Crow Puns
Why was the crow so angry after his stand up comedy gig? The venue paid him in coffee instead of caw fee.
Bowling Puns
The crowd had filled up the venue and everyone was waiting for the bowling alley to open. Finally, they got the ball rolling.
Garden Puns
What happened to the Venus Fly Trap's plant food?
The arbor-ate-em.
Sun Puns
Why does Venus have a crush on the sun?
Because the sun is really hot.
Onion Puns
Which venue did all the vegetables choose to open their fighting club in? An onion ring!
Funny Haiku
Wooden door; wide and creaky.
Sculking cat; snide and sneaky.
Skeletons; cold and clanky.
Madame Witch; old and cranky.
Ancient paintings; strange and spooky.
Watching eyes; crazed and looky.
Blackest bat; fast and flappy.
Venus Flytrap; mighty snappy.
Wailing ghosts; always moany.
Piano playing on its owny.
Time to go! Scream and shouty!
Read the sign – ‘No Way Out-y!’

- Julie Anna Douglas
Cactus Puns
Scientists have genetically modified a Venus Fly Trap to have the skin of a cactus
They say its bark is worse than its bite.
Color Puns
What's the difference between a colorful women's garment and a famous live music venue?
One's a house of blues, the other's a blouse of hues.
Planet Puns
I telephoned the tennis star Serena Williams for an interview and asked her, “What’s your favourite planet?”
Her: It’s Venus.

Me: Sorry Venus, would you put Serena on the phone?