I tripped in France.
Eiffel over.
So you live in the seventh most populous city in France?
Must be Nice.
I read Reims of info before I got here, but nothing can prepare you for how beautiful this place is.
I used to be a personal driver in France
But now I have nothing to chauffeur it.
Don’t make such a Dreyfus about it.
Why is the French Prime Minister never seen in the morning?
Becasue he is pm not am!
What do they call the Hunger Games in France?
Battle Royale with Cheese.
Did you hear of the new disease going through France?
I've heard it was a Paris-ite.
Which city in France is the nicest?
Nice.
Everyone knows the Italians invented pizza but few know that it was perfected by French rebels in nazi occupied France during WWII.
It was the pizza de resistance.
I hate to Gauguin, but I have to catch my flight.
What did France, Great Britain, and their allies say after The Great War?
World War Won.
It’s a beautiful Degas!
Can I be Candide with you?
What’s Austrian and took over France?
Croissants.
What happens when you go to the bathroom in France?
European!
What do France and a pigeon have in common?
Every 5 minutes, there is a coo.
There’s so much to do here so I’m never Bordeaux-ed.
French guy goes into a bar with a frog on his head
The bartender asks “where’d you get that?” And the frog says “in France. There’s loads of them.”
France is beautiful in every Cezanne.
What’s the capital of France?
The F.
It’s time to say Versailles to France.
French people give me the crepes.
Living in france must be hard
I mean, 100 dollars is only a cent.
So I went to France and bought a house made of bread
I guess you could say I'm living in pain.
When in France, I have Nantes-thing to complain about.
Why is research more trustworthy if it comes from France?
It's Pierre-reviewed.
German tourist visits France.
Guy at the Airport: "Nationality?"
German Dude: "German".
Airport Guy: "Occupation?"
German Dude: "Nein, nein, Only Vacation".
What's in the middle of Paris?
R.
Why can I not make jokes about the recent attacks in France?
Because jokes are all about execution.
From up here, I Cannes see the whole French Riviera!
I love a good shindig. Just call me Napoleon Bonapart-y.
It’s impossible to Rouen a trip to France.
Can a fencing champion born in France, but raised in the U.S. represent either country in the olympics?
Yes. Because they have duel citizenship.
How do you Charlemange-age to get through the last few days before vacation?
Why do they eat snail in France?
Because they don’t have fast food.