What is your mouth’s favorite exercise?
Burpees.
I've got 4 eyes, 3 legs, 1 tail, and 12 toes. What am I?
A liar.
What do you call Bears without ears
B.
Why do bees have sticky hair?
Because they use honey combs!
I mustache you a question..
but I'll shave it for later.
A man goes to the doctors and says " Doc, I'm having problems with my ears, I think I'm going deaf".
The Doc says " Can you tell me the symptoms?"
The man replies, " Well, Homer's the big fat bloke, and Marge has blue hair!"
After making love the other night, I told my spouse that I love when the whisper sweet things in my ear...
So my spouse leaned in close and whispered..."Syrup."
You know, people say they pick their nose,
but I feel like I just was born with mine.
I accidentally rubbed ketchup in my eyes.
Now I have Heinzsight.
What did Van Gogh name the ear he didn't cut off?
Van Stay.
I grew facial hair without telling anyone.
It's my secret 'stache.
Daughter: Did you get a hair cut?
Dad: No sweetheart I got em all cut.
My hair was acting crazy so I told it to comb down.
How did the hipster burn his mouth?
He ate his food before it was cool.
Why are super loud sounds bad for your ears?
It hertz your eardrums.
What do you call a man with no body and no nose?
Nobody knows
I told the doctor I was deaf in my left ear he said 'are you sure?'
Then I said 'I'm definite."
When she saw her first strands of gray hair...
She thought she would dye.
What helps a pirates hair grow?
Aaarrrgan oil.
Why can’t your ear be 12 inches long?
Because then it would be a foot.
If Satan ever lost his hair...
There would be hell toupee.
Why does Bruce Wayne have such fabulous hair?
He uses conditioner Gordon.
Did you know Davy Crockett had three ears?
A left ear, a right ear, and a wild frontier.
I got punched in the mouth by a drug addict today.
Now my jaw’s all methed up.