Why don’t orcas have hair?
They have whale pattern baldness.
Why did the kid put the dinky car in his ear?
Because he wanted to give it a wax job.
What do you call an eye that can fly?
A real eye soar.
What do you call an ear with no eyes
No-eyed ear
I got punched in the mouth by a drug addict today.
Now my jaw’s all methed up.
I can't hear out of my ear...
It's really EAR-itating.
My friend didn't want to participate in the pick your new hairstyle conference but I convinced him...
He took part.
Why do seals carry fish in their mouth?
Because they don't have pockets.
A doctor walked into an exam room to see a patient with carrots sticking out his ears and broccoli up his nose.
The doctor said: “I can tell right away that you haven't been eating properly."
A man goes to the doctors and says " Doc, I'm having problems with my ears, I think I'm going deaf".
The Doc says " Can you tell me the symptoms?"
The man replies, " Well, Homer's the big fat bloke, and Marge has blue hair!"
What do you call somebody who's addicted to trimming hair?
A clipptomaniac!
How does a lumberjack trim his beard?
With a chinsaw.
Bad puns are how eye roll.
What do you call an eye specialist with a short shirt?
A crop-toptometrist
I bought a wig for my wife, at a discount store...
Didn't want toupee full price.
I just saw a cashier scan the eyes of a rude customer with her barcode reader.
The look on his face was priceless.
Eye drops are technically blinker fluid.
What do you do if your nose goes on strike?
Picket.
I accidentally rubbed ketchup in my eyes.
Now I have Heinzsight.
Why do Pencils shave?
To look sharp.
Did you know if you hold a hard hat up to your ear....
you can hear the OSHA?
Someone stole my wig!
That was a bald move.
Huge explosion at the hair brush factory...
Investigators are still combing through the wreckage.
I mustache you a question..
but I'll shave it for later.