I went to Spain to attend the Running of the Bulls, but when I arrived, there was nothing there but cows with fake horns attached.
I was in shambles.
French guy goes into a bar with a frog on his head
The bartender asks “where’d you get that?” And the frog says “in France. There’s loads of them.”
In Ancient Greece, people who had beliefs contrary to the worship of Poseidon were executed for Heresea.
If Russia attacked Turkey from behind do you think Greece would help?
Are these pants too tight in the Balzac?
My son asked me what Micheal Jackson was doing in Italy
I told him he was "sight-heeheeing."
A company from Israel took over the Greek national cheese factory in Greece
Now it's called the Cheeses of Nazareth.
Did you know that the Greek god Chronos was in the Mafia?
He was the Don of Time itself!
My son claims that he identifies as an ancient Greek string instrument.
Frankly, I think he's a lyre.
Everyone knows the Italians invented pizza but few know that it was perfected by French rebels in nazi occupied France during WWII.
It was the pizza de resistance.
Did you hear about the famous Spanish streaker?
Senor Willy.
Which bus went from Spain to America?
Columbus.
Some people say Greece should stop using the euro as currency...
I think they're being over-drachmatic.
Half of Italy is complaining about the coronavirus and the other half is laughing not taking it seriously.
All they do is cheese and wine.
I'll be making a movie about the Greek alphabets.
It's a Psi Phi film.
What do you call a hangover when you're alone in Spain?
Barf-a-lona.
There’s so much to do here so I’m never Bordeaux-ed.
I love a good shindig. Just call me Napoleon Bonapart-y.
Whilst holidaying in France I saw a group of mushrooms performing Queen covers.
I said 'You're brilliant, what's the band called?'
They replied 'We are the Champignons."
Where do recluses live in Spain?
Barceloner.
What do you call four Spanish guys in a capsized boat?
Quatro sinko.
Who is the most famous actor in Greece ?
John Travolta.
My 4-year-old son has been learning Spanish all year and he still can't say the word, please.
which I think is poor for four.
I can’t believe you have the de Gaulle to say that to my face.
You heard about the Spanish woman that is now a man?
He’s called Senor Rita.
What does a frog in Paris eat?
French Flies.
The Greeks make the best cheese
You feta believe it!
What is the call of a Spanish speaking owl?
Quién...Quién.
What did France, Great Britain, and their allies say after The Great War?
World War Won.
Me and my friend were going to a costume party. He told me he was coming as a small island off the coast of Italy.
I said don’t be Sicily.
Why is research more trustworthy if it comes from France?
It's Pierre-reviewed.
How do you leave any building in Spain?
You "follow salida lida lida..."
I asked my buddy if he wanted to know what the word “the” was in Spanish. He expressed his disinterest and I responded with...
"Your los."
What do you call the Greek version of Spider-Man?
Pita Parker.
Can a fencing champion born in France, but raised in the U.S. represent either country in the olympics?
Yes. Because they have duel citizenship.
I heard the King of spain caught Covid...
Heard he tested positive while on his plane going somewhere, now he has to quarantine there.
So the Reign in Spain remains solely on the Plane.
Did you know the first French fries weren't actually cooked in France? They were cooked in Greece.
Someone from Southern France sent me an MS Word file with 200 pages.
It's a Languedoc.
A mummified macaroni pizza was uncovered in Italy today.
The man who uncovered it says "It's a pizza of our pasta."
My uncle moved to Spain to sing on stage by night and sell UPVC windows by day. He changed his name to....
Enrique Doubleglazius.
I was joking with my mailman, and said I had a package to ship to Spain.... to Parcelona...
He didn't laugh though. The key to a joke like that is the delivery.
Why do they eat snail in France?
Because they don’t have fast food.
In Greek Mythology, Chiron was not only half man and half horse, he was also a doctor of medicine
That made him the centaur for disease control.
How does Mr. Bean introduce himself in Spain?
Soy Bean.
What is the most popular flower in France?
Croissanthemums.
Did you hear about the Frenchman who jumped into the river in Paris?
He was declared to be in Seine.
Did you hear about the spies trying to infiltrate japan, Italy, and Germany in WWII?
They were denied axis.
Where do folks from Bilbao, Spain buy outdoor equipment?
The Basque Pro Shop.
I’m in love with France, and I ain’t Lyon.
Whats a good Spanish sports channel?
ESBieN.