German tourist visits France.
Guy at the Airport: "Nationality?"
German Dude: "German".
Airport Guy: "Occupation?"
German Dude: "Nein, nein, Only Vacation".
I've finally worked out why Spain is so good at football
Nobody expects the Spanish in position.
Don’t make such a Dreyfus about it.
I saw this beautiful tower in Italy..
It was a Pisa art!
My son asked today “ Dad, are people in Spain cannibals?”
I answered “Why would you think that?”
He said “Well, my teacher said they mostly live off of tourists there.”
Some people say Greece should stop using the euro as currency...
I think they're being over-drachmatic.
What do you call four Spanish guys in a capsized boat?
Quatro sinko.
I've been dying to go to Greece on vacation.
But all they serve is bar food.
I asked my buddy if he wanted to know what the word “the” was in Spanish. He expressed his disinterest and I responded with...
"Your los."
What Beatles song charted highest in Italy?
Penne Lane.
It’s impossible to Rouen a trip to France.
Did you hear that Mexicans created a machine that dispenses fish?
They call it a pez dispenser.
Whats a good Spanish sports channel?
ESBieN.
Genoa bout the bridge collapse in Italy?
Ah well, we won't go over it then.
What do you call a Jamaican man born in Italy?
Reggae-Toni.
What do you call a Greek philosopher who loves rice?
Arisotto.
French guy goes into a bar with a frog on his head
The bartender asks “where’d you get that?” And the frog says “in France. There’s loads of them.”
When I went to highschool in Italy my classmates were one year older than me.
I Skipped pasta grade.
What do you call a Greek love song?
An Aphro-ditty.
Why is research more trustworthy if it comes from France?
It's Pierre-reviewed.
What does a Greek God say when they answer the phone?
"Whodisious?"
What did the Spanish fireman call his two sons?
José and Hose-B.
What did the father ant said to his son when they moved to France from America?
Son, we are now Europeants!
Which city in France is the nicest?
Nice.
What happens when you go to the bathroom in France?
European!
In Greek Mythology, Chiron was not only half man and half horse, he was also a doctor of medicine
That made him the centaur for disease control.
What language do they speak in Italy
Times New Roman.
How does Mr. Bean introduce himself in Spain?
Soy Bean.
Whilst holidaying in France I saw a group of mushrooms performing Queen covers.
I said 'You're brilliant, what's the band called?'
They replied 'We are the Champignons."
It's only quarantine if it comes from the quarantine region of France;
otherwise, it's just sparkling isolation.
Did you hear about the famous Spanish streaker?
Senor Willy.
If you want to vacation in Italy, don't be afraid to Rome around.
I was at a thrift store and the guy ahead of me was purchasing an antique urn made in Greece
He asked the cashier if she knew how much a Greek urns.
Why do they eat snail in France?
Because they don’t have fast food.
Did you hear about the spies trying to infiltrate japan, Italy, and Germany in WWII?
They were denied axis.
My boss brought bagels for breakfast and asked me which one I wanted. I said "give me one of the Spanish bagels". He responded " One of the Spanish Bagels?"
"Ay poppy."
French fries aren’t cooked in France
They’re cooked in greece.
What does a Greek machine need to work?
Greece.
We Rodin a taxi around the city after dark.
What do Spanish speaking people prefer to travel in groups of 2 or 4?
No tres-passing.
What's the name of the machine the ancient greeks used to calculate how best to fight hybrid monsters?
The antichimera mechanism.
Can a fencing champion born in France, but raised in the U.S. represent either country in the olympics?
Yes. Because they have duel citizenship.
Why did everyone want to go to Italy during World War II?
They were Fascistanating.
I'll be making a movie about the Greek alphabets.
It's a Psi Phi film.
French people give me the crepes.
My 4-year-old son has been learning Spanish all year and he still can't say the word, please.
which I think is poor for four.
Why can I not make jokes about the recent attacks in France?
Because jokes are all about execution.
If Russia attacked Turkey from behind do you think Greece would help?
What do pups eat in Italy?
Pawsta.
The 70s/80s aesthetic has recently become pretty popular in France.
They say it has a certain Gen X sais quoi.