Sports Jokes

The Lonely Child A blonde gets a job as a physical education teacher of 14-year-olds. On her first day, she comes to watch the kids playing soccer. She watches as they all get together and starts playing. However, she quickly notices a boy at the end of the field standing alone, while all the other kids are running around having fun. She takes pity on him and decides to speak to him. "You ok?" she says kindly. "Yes." he says. "You can go and play with the other kids you know." she says encouragingly. "It’s best I stay here." he says. "Why’s that sweetie?" asks the compassionate teacher. The boy gives her a weird look and says, “Because I’m the Goalie.”
Where’s the best beach to buy sports gear at?
Jersey Shore.
Crows, they just love sports, crow-quet to be precise.
Why don’t skeletons do well at sports?
Because they have no skin in the game!
Which sports team do wine lovers always root for?
The Reds!
The peach sports organization rended a commercial peach for a game of peach ball.
What do you call a regular potato broadcasting sports?
A common tater.
I bring my TV remote into every sports bar I go to so I can change the channel to whatever I want.
It’s a real game changer
Cherries are actually great at a lot of different sports. Their favorite one, in case you were wondering, is archerry.
Whats a good Spanish sports channel?
ESBieN.
Management Knows Best A Japanese company and a Swedish company decided to have a row competition as a publicity stunt. Both teams trained long and hard. Competition came and the Japanese won by 1 kilometer. The Swedish company's leadership was shocked. But in this major crisis, the leadership showed its value: They wanted a rematch next year so they could save face. The other company agreed. Right away, the Swedish team started to examine the reason they lost. The company created a special task force. After a lengthy examination for several months, the report was submitted that it appeared the Japanese team had one person at the helm and the rest were rowing. On the Swedish team, one person was rowing as the rest were at the helm. After this report, the company decided to hire a consultant to solve the issue. After experts went through the findings of the task force for a few months the judgment was clear: there were too few people rowing and too many people at the helm. Armed with this knowledge, the Swedish company took swift action and the result was that there would be 2 steersmen, 2 senior steersmen, a captain and a rower. In addition, the rower was enrolled in a bonus scheme system to motivate him for better results. So a year went by and it was time for the rematch. Surprisingly, the Japanese won again, this time by 3 kilometers! The Swedish company management knew exactly what to do. They fired the rower due to poor performance, got large bonuses for all managers for their initiative in trying to solve the issue and for next year, they decided they would try to design a better boat.
What did the tornado say to the sports car?
Let's go for a spin!
Why aren’t trees competitive sports fans? They like to root for everyone.
The walnut was not good at sports but did really well with his macadamia at school.
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