The ref keeps shafting us the offsides; I think he's blue lyin'.
I like my breakfast like my tennis grip: Continental.
What type of films should players watch to improve their shot? Slap stick.
I made a snap decision to watch football today
The reason why bowling alleys are so quiet is such that you can hear a pin drop.
What are the favorite video games for basketball players? Shooting stars.
Where do football players go shopping in the offseason? The tackle shop.
I’m never board when I’m at the pool.
The last time I wanted to go bowling, all the pins were on strike. So I just stayed at home and watched TV instead.
Which is the coolest football team in Italy?
AC Milan.
Their soccer team and the US navy had one thing in common, they both spent over $50 million on a sub.
What do you get for diving into a wave of oranges.
Vitamin Sea.
Why did the other volleyball team bow? Because they heard that the queens of the court were there.
Whatever you do this summer, be sure to make a splash.
How did the swim team manage to pay for new pool renovations?
They pool-ed their resources!
Setters do it better. This sounds like a good motto to put on a T-shirt.
Ski Area Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, was it Red Bull that gave you wings, or are you just an angel?
What's the difference between a sorority girl and a bowling ball?
You can only fit 3 fingers in a bowling ball.
Why did the vampire strike out?
He used the wrong bat.
In later years was the Great One in decline? Yes he was on the Wayne.
There are many grounds religious children can practice their soccer skills. However, most of them love the prayground.
I’d like to throw away my old can, but my pusher friend here says he loves junk balls.
What happens if you run in front of a car?
You get tired.
The only time a basketball team can chase a baseball team is five after nine.
Why do volleyball players join the military? They want to gain extra experience in the service.
What do you call it when a football player suffers a career-ending injury in his last game before retirement? Gridirony!
Deep sea diving is so dangerous.
I just can’t fathom it.
Why did the golfer need new socks?
Because there was a hole in one.
Why don’t quarterbacks share puns at the line of scrimmage?
Because they produce audible groans!
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Eyesore.
Eyesore who?
Eyesore from my long run—can we take the elevator?
Why should you never go back in time to alter the outcome of a football game?
You’ll be called for past interference!
This is one spray-cation to remember.
Why can’t a car play football?
Because it only has one boot.
When the going gets tough, let the pins fall where they may.
Oh buoy – we’re having a splash bash!
Why did the kicker finally decide to marry his high school sweetheart?
She was a fair catch!
When is the course too wet to play golf?
When your golf cart capsizes.
I know an untidy guy who’s excellent at playing soccer.
What a Messi guy.
Why was the basketball court so slippery?
Because all the players were dribbling on it.
Beauty is only pig skin deep
I can’t believe I framed the ball in for a winner. Shank you!
What type of noodles do swimmers like best?
Pool noodles!
I surprised the judges at my last diving competition by performing a cannonball.
I made a huge splash.
What type of football player is the biggest drug addict?
The lineman.
Why couldn't the skeleton play football?
He didn't have the guts.
Why are Scandinavians the fastest runners in the world?
Because they start out near the Finnish line.
The reason why soccer players are brilliant in math is because they know how to use their heads well.
Why did the baseball batter go crazy?
Because the pitcher only threw scewballs.
Where do point guards take their dates to party after the game?
To a basket ball.
No intentional frowning is allowed here.