I wanted to do some research on organs in biology, but I had no WiFi and couldn't find the information I wanted.
I wound up using cellular.
What do hackers do on a boat?
Phishing.
What do Russians call a bad WiFi connection?
Inter-NIET
I almost got in trouble because I tried to talk to someone in the same room as me over the phone...
...It was a close call.
An American guy visits a friend in Scotland.
When he arrives at his friend's house, he asks "Can I use your Wifi?"
The friend looks a bit perplexed, but then he smiles and says, "Sure ye can, she's up th' stairs."
I couldn't stop laughing when my father warned my brother, saying, "If you hack my Microsoft Office, I will find you, you have my Word".
I want anarchy
Because my keyboard is missing one.
Recently I was at a store walking down the flash drives and hard drives section.
I have to say, it was quite a walk down the memory lane.
I was at a funeral & asked the priest for the WiFi password
"Have some respect for the dead!" he said
I replied "Is that all lower case?"
I changed my password to "incorrect". So whenever I forget what it is the computer will say "Your password is incorrect".
I told my boss, "Sorry I'm late. I was having computer issues."
Boss: Hard drive?
Me: No, the commute was fine. It's my laptop.
Just received Areal Flood Advisory notification on my phone
I should hope it's a real one, the fake ones are just annoying.
Why did the computer squeak? Because someone stepped on its mouse!
My son accidentally smashed his foot on the table and as he was hopping around the room screaming in pain, I rushed to the phone, picked it up and asked him, "Do you want me to call..."
"...a TOE TRUCK!!??"
Why do microwaves always mess up WiFi...
...when every one I've tried creates hotspots?
What was Hitler's favorite computer game?
Mein Kraft.
How can someone tell if a bee is on their phone? They'll get a buzzy signal.
Dancing Queen used to have a lot of profanity in its lyrics, but after computers became common
No-one needed an ABBA cuss
A robot is eating a hard drive for lunch.
The robot's friend asks for a bite and the robot says "Sure, but just a small bite." His friend takes a bite and the robot shouts, "Hey! That's a megabyte!"
What is a phone's favorite TV show? Game of Phones.
If cheese were downloadable, then I'd try to throw my hard drive as far as possible.
What I'm saying is, I'd chuck e-cheese.
Why does Mr. Potato need a cell phone? Incase Mr. Onion Rings.
You know you're texting too much when...
you try to text, but you're on a landline!
Q. Where do computers keep their money?
A. In a data bank.
My computer wants to build a snowman.
It's frozen.
What is an unlimited phone plan? A limit cannot be charged.
Interesting that illegally copying on computers is known as piracy.
I suppose you CTRL C
Did you hear about the new WiFi connected chef's knife?
It's cutting-edge technology.
Did you hear about the new Wifi connected chef's knife?
It's cutting-edge technology.
What's one of the worst things you could come across while surfing the web?
Your keyboard.
I asked my son to go get me a phone book. He laughed, called me a dinosaur, and handed me his iPhone.
The spider is dead, the iPhone screen is cracked, and my son is furious!
Why did the person throw their computer cabinet in the air?
They wanted to store it in the cloud.
What happened to the girl's phone when she was getting a perm done? She got a frizzy signal.
In an attempt to deter computer hackers I've changed all my passwords to 'Brazil Nut'
That will be a hard one to crack.
I left my phone under my pillow last night and woke up to coins underneath it. It must have been the Blue-tooth fairy.
What did the WiFi router say when it was unplugged?
"Tell my wifi love her
The oldest computer was an apple given to Adam and Eve back in paradise lost, but it came with very limited memory of just 1 byte. And then everything crashed.
I love complimentary WiFi.
It makes me feel good about myself.
Why did a pirate leave the boat to get his forgotten cell phone? Booty calls.
What do a phone and an engaged girl have in common? They both have rings.
I imagine eventually there will be a day when we have a WiFi hotspot on Mt. Everest.
Only then will we reach peak internet.
How do you come up with a secure password to protect yourself against hackers?
Just make it the last 10 digits of pi.
What did the girl say when she got a fake call? "I think that call was phoney".
Why did Karen press Ctrl-Shift-Esc on her keyboard?
Because she wanted to speak to the Task Manager!
Q. Why couldn't the dinosaur play games on the computer?
A. Because he ate the mous
Why don't skeletons have a mobile? They don't have any body to talk to.
Why did the telecommuter lose his job? He had to many hang ups.
The computer said my password needed at least eight characters and at least one number, so I changed it to Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.
I deleted all my German friends from my cell phone contact list.
Now I'm Hanns free.
Q. Why can't computers play tennis?
A. They try to surf the net.