Hardcore programmers will agree that neither of them would use AC because they all prefer to open windows.
I asked the bartender for the WiFi password but he told me to buy a drink first. So I ordered a Moscow Mule and asked him again. He handed me a card with the password. It said:
"Buy a drink first" ... no spaces, all lowercase."
Why was the old computer sad?
Because it had a floppy disk.
Interesting that illegally copying on computers is known as piracy.
I suppose you CTRL C
Since getting sober, I decided to go with the cheapest cell phone provider I can find!
Way fewer bars!!!
My computer is so slow it's running in the '90s.
Q. Why couldn't the dinosaur play games on the computer?
A. Because he ate the mous
Why did the computer wear glasses?
To improve its web sight.
Why do microwaves always mess up WiFi...
...when every one I've tried creates hotspots?
What happened to the girl's phone when she was getting a perm done? She got a frizzy signal.
Why did the man get so sad his computer had a virus?
It was a terminal illness.
What did the thrifty man say when he got his phone bill? "Who says talk is cheap?"
You might be able to use a smuggled cell phone in prison.
You just have to have cell coverage.
The umpire kept answering his phone during the softball game.
He said he didn't want to miss any calls.
I want anarchy
Because my keyboard is missing one.
Q. How does a tree get on the computer?
A. It logs on!
I felt sad for my brother's computer being overclocked because I heard the processor say, "Stop it! It hertz so much!".
Why is the 7 key on the keyboard so afraid?
Because the & is near
If they could prove cell phones give deadly radiation
You could say to people you don't like "cant talk right now, you're giving me cancer".
I want to tell you one more painful phone pun but I decided it's uncalled for.
What is a computer's favorite animal?
A RAM.
How do lumberjacks shut down their computers?.
They log off.
Did you hear about the guy who got fired from the Keyboard Factory?
He didn't put enough shifts in.
My computer wants to build a snowman.
It's frozen.
Did you hear about the new Wifi connected chef's knife?
It's cutting-edge technology.
I was on the phone with my wife and said, "I'm almost home, honey, please put the coffee maker on." After a twenty-second pause, I asked, "You still there, sweetheart?"
"Yeah," she replied. "But I don't think the coffee maker wants to talk right now"
My wife told me she'll slam my head on the keyboard if I don't get off the computer.
I'm not too worried, I think she's jokinlkjhfakljn m,.nbziyoao78yv87dfaoyuofaytdf.
My wireless keyboard isn't working
I guess I need to re-pair it.
Where are dead computer hackers buried?
In decrypt.
I used to store motivational quotes that I found online, onto the cloud, for whenever I needed some inspiration.
Unfortunately I forgot the password for my Google account.
I have no Drive.
I visited a coffee shop where the Wifi password was wedonthavewifi.
It was a very frustrating conversation with the cashier.
How do you come up with a secure password to protect yourself against hackers?
Just make it the last 10 digits of pi.
Why does Mr. Potato need a cell phone? Incase Mr. Onion Rings.
I heard that starting next year, keyboards will no longer be sold with italics...
But it was a bold-faced lie.
My kid asked why I named our WiFi "ship"?
But that's how everything syncs.
Hey baby, are you a cloud server?
Because I have something to upload from my hard drive.
What's the sketchiest button combo on a computer keyboard?
Shift + T
Why did the person throw their computer cabinet in the air?
They wanted to store it in the cloud.
My Wifi password is "writtenontherouter"
And I let all my guests walk to the router and let them unsuccessfully try to use the initial password until I tell them it's literally "writtenontherouter".
Today I Learned I should NOT have my password be the name of my cat.
I then turned to my cat and said, "Well, wJ:cg/v&A;6BTt, I guess it's back to the drawing board."
Clean water is like password
Not everyone has access to it.
How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
None because it's a hardware issue.
Did you hear about the Wi-Fi wedding?
The ceremony was awful, but the reception was great!
What do hackers do on a boat?
Phishing.
Why did the computer come with airbags?
In case it crashed.
Why did the hard drive crash?
Because it had a bad driver.
'what's the Wifi password?'
'Its for security'
'Haha, yes, I know that. But what's the password?'.
'No, it's 'forsecurity'. All one word, lower case.'.
Was going to change my password to MilkyTea but apparently that's too weak.
I didn't know WiFi stood for Wireless Fidelity.
I guess I just didn't get the connection.
I for one
is something you might do if you had a broken keyboard