I love complimentary WiFi.
It makes me feel good about myself.
It's okay password...
...I'm insecure too...
I dropped my computer on my foot.
It mega-hurts.
One day, I carried my laptop to the zoo because I wanted a RAM upgrade so I would have lots of memory when I came back.
"Dad, my computer can't find the Wifi printer anymore... I renamed it to Bob Marley, same password."
"Why Bob Marley?" - he asked.
"Because its always jammin"
What made the computer so smart?
Because he listened to his motherboard!
Why was the computer late to work? Because it had a hard drive!
Why did the computer come with airbags?
In case it crashed.
How did the mobile phone propose to his girlfriend?
He gave her a ring
What did the baby computer call its father?
Data.
What brand of hand soap do telephone operators use? Dial.
Why did the computer wear glasses?
To improve its web sight.
How did Sam win the talent show? Sam-sung.
What did the thrifty man say when he got his phone bill? "Who says talk is cheap?"
I was at a funeral & asked the priest for the WiFi password
"Have some respect for the dead!" he said
I replied "Is that all lower case?"
My keyboard fell apart today.
I feel like I'm losing Ctrl of everything.
Got fired from my job at the keyboard factory. I couldn't keep the space clean.
What do you call a solar powered keyboard?
A photosynthesiser
I know when I store files, my computer gets hungry. It starts telling me about the bytes I use and how many are remaining for him to fill up completely.
It doesn't matter if my wife tells me Im not mature
Im not going to let her enter my tree house without the right password.
I almost got in trouble because I tried to talk to someone in the same room as me over the phone...
...It was a close call.
I'm not like other keyboards...
I'm qwerty
My partner got mad when she found so much spam on my computer.
She said, "Food belongs on a plate!"
I changed my password to "incorrect". So whenever I forget what it is the computer will say "Your password is incorrect".
I think my neighbor is stalking me as she's been googling my name on her computer. I saw it through my telescope last night.
Where do the keys on a keyboard go to have a good time
The spacebar.
Autocorrect has become my worst enema.
Interesting that illegally copying on computers is known as piracy.
I suppose you CTRL C
What was Hitler's favorite computer game?
Mein Kraft.
Computers cannot make good boxers because their bark is worse than their byte.
Trying to teach my dad how to put WiFi on his tablet
Me: You just have to go to settings!
Dad: This is just making me upsettings!
On the spot no hesitation! Gotta love him!
I can relate to my computer so much. Even I go to sleep after 25mins of inactivity.
How did the computer hackers get away from the scene of crime?
They just ransomware.
Did you hear about the computer virus that was programmed by a cat?
It's considered meowware!
I came into the office early and switched as many M and N keys on keyboards as I could. Some might say I'm a monster...
But others will say nomster
Q. What did the computer say to the cookie?
A. "Can I have your chocolate chip?"
What is an unlimited phone plan? A limit cannot be charged.
I swear I was born in the wrong generation. Nowadays everyone is addicted to their phones.
I wish I was born in the 80's when everyone was addicted to Cocaine.
What did the girl say when she got a fake call? "I think that call was phoney".
My kid asked why I named our WiFi "ship"?
But that's how everything syncs.
Recently I was at a store walking down the flash drives and hard drives section.
I have to say, it was quite a walk down the memory lane.
My wife asked: "What's our WiFi?"
I said: It's an internet connection that works wirelessly through something called a modem. Why?"
She hasn't spoken to me all week.
What happened to the plane run by a computer?
It crashed.
My computer became self aware and asked for a snack.
I replied, "Sorry I'm fresh out of computer chips."
Why did the telecommuter lose his job? He had to many hang ups.
A few punny Wifi names you can use:
Wi-Fight the Inevitable
Chance the Router
The LAN Before Time
Silence of the LAN
I Believe Wi Can Fi
The Password is...
Click Here to Download
Get off my LAN
Router? I Hardly Knew Her
Definitely Not Wifi
The umpire kept answering his phone during the softball game.
He said he didn't want to miss any calls.
I asked the bartender for the WiFi password but he told me to buy a drink first. So I ordered a Moscow Mule and asked him again. He handed me a card with the password. It said:
"Buy a drink first" ... no spaces, all lowercase."
My wireless keyboard isn't working
I guess I need to re-pair it.
Hardcore programmers will agree that neither of them would use AC because they all prefer to open windows.