People are always amazed by the skilled tattoo artists in Spain
Nobody expects the Spanish ink precision.
What did the Spanish fireman call his two sons?
José and Hose-B.
I asked my buddy if he wanted to know what the word “the” was in Spanish. He expressed his disinterest and I responded with...
"Your los."
How come there are no automatic cars in Spain?
They’re all Manuel.
Did you hear that cats have carried out a Coup in Barcelona and declared independence from Spain?
They're calling themselves the Republic of Catalo-nya.
My son asked today “ Dad, are people in Spain cannibals?”
I answered “Why would you think that?”
He said “Well, my teacher said they mostly live off of tourists there.”
Where to Bees go to party in Spain?
Ibiza.
So there’s this Spanish magician. His main trick was performing a spectacular vanishing act. He said that he’d vanish on the count of three. “Uno” “Dos”
And then he vanished, without a tres.
“Is this the Spanish word for ‘nap’?” She asked, pointing to a word on the page.
“Si, está.”
So I asked my Spanish friend if he knew where fish lived.
He said "Si."
What do Spanish phantoms say when they like something?
me ghosta.
What do you call a hangover when you're alone in Spain?
Barf-a-lona.
How does Mr. Bean introduce himself in Spain?
Soy Bean.
What do you call a rental car in Spain?
A Barceloaner.
I visited Spain and couldn't stop looking at the architecture
It was very Moorish.
My collection of Swiss watches was stolen in Spain.
Adios Omegas.
I was at my hotel in Spain and wasn't feeling well.
Reception said they had a doctor on staff.
The doctor asked me lots of questions and I was then feeling much better.
I told reception I didn't expect a hotel would have a doctor on staff
They said it was a Spanish Inn Physician
I've finally worked out why Spain is so good at football
Nobody expects the Spanish in position.
Did you hear that Mexicans created a machine that dispenses fish?
They call it a pez dispenser.
I used to live in in Aragon, in Spain.
Then I left.
I'm Aragone.
I went to Spain to attend the Running of the Bulls, but when I arrived, there was nothing there but cows with fake horns attached.
I was in shambles.
You heard about the Spanish woman that is now a man?
He’s called Senor Rita.
What is the call of a Spanish speaking owl?
Quién...Quién.
Vasco de Balboa told the Queen of Spain, “I discovered a large body of water on my journey.”
She said, “Could you be a little more pacific?”
It’s lonely between Germany and Spain
Not many France, nobody’s Nice to me, everyone seems to be Lyon. It’s just Eiffel.
What do Spanish speaking people prefer to travel in groups of 2 or 4?
No tres-passing.
Where do recluses live in Spain?
Barceloner.
Did you hear about the watchmaker who is half Spanish and half Irish?
His name is Juan O'Clock.
It wasn't til I studied Spanish as an adult that learned Spain discovered Canada.
As our teacher explained it, the first maps said "Acá, nada."
How do you leave any building in Spain?
You "follow salida lida lida..."
What do you call four Spanish guys in a capsized boat?
Quatro sinko.
My uncle moved to Spain to sing on stage by night and sell UPVC windows by day. He changed his name to....
Enrique Doubleglazius.
Did you hear about the famous Spanish streaker?
Senor Willy.
My 4-year-old son has been learning Spanish all year and he still can't say the word, please.
which I think is poor for four.
What do you call a small mosque in Spain?
A mosquito!
I heard the King of spain caught Covid...
Heard he tested positive while on his plane going somewhere, now he has to quarantine there.
So the Reign in Spain remains solely on the Plane.
Which bus went from Spain to America?
Columbus.
Whats a good Spanish sports channel?
ESBieN.
What was Michael Jackson's favorite Spanish food?
Jamon!
What milk comes from Spain?
Soy Milk.
Recently, i started learning Spanish
But i can't hola long conversation.
What do you call an elderly Spanish man?
A senõr citizen.
I asked my Spanish girlfriend to make a to-do list
so she wrote down everything.
My friend learned Spanish by jotting sentences repeatedly...
He used wrote learning.
I like to say mucho when i’m talking to my Spanish speaking friends.
It means a lot to them.
So in my trip to Spain i got attacked by a bull.
Oh man that's spainful.
My boss brought bagels for breakfast and asked me which one I wanted. I said "give me one of the Spanish bagels". He responded " One of the Spanish Bagels?"
"Ay poppy."
Where do folks from Bilbao, Spain buy outdoor equipment?
The Basque Pro Shop.
What do you call a sneezing big foot in Spanish?
Achoopacabra.
I was joking with my mailman, and said I had a package to ship to Spain.... to Parcelona...
He didn't laugh though. The key to a joke like that is the delivery.