I'm 6'6", 280lb, and I've played piano for 23 years
I'm a huge pianist.
What do you get if you drop a piano on an army base?
A flat major.
What's brown, lumpy, and sits on a piano bench?
Beethoven's Last Movement
What do you call it when you spill your drink all over a piano?
Rag time.
When did the pianist finally turn their life around?
After they hit Rockbottomoff.
What's worse than a SPIDER on your PIANO?
CRAB on your ORGAN.
I wrote a song to memorialize the man killed when a piano fell down a mine shaft.
It's in A flat minor.
Did you hear the one about the pianist convention?
They had a few keynote speakers
I've removed all the black keys from my piano
Hopefully I'll C Major improvement!
What's better than having roses on your piano?
Tulips on your organ....
My uncle was crushed by a piano...
His funeral was very low key.
What was the pianist doing at the mall?
Chopin.
Why was the piano laughing?
Because I was tickling his ivories
"learn to play piano by ear!"
"Thanks, I'd rather use my fingers."
After playing guitar for years I thought I could learn to play the piano.
But it's not an easy instrument to pick up.
Why did the pianist quit playing the piano?
Bad Bach.
What do you call a low-quality Russian composer, pianist, and conductor of the late Romantic period?
Knockmaninoff.
Why did the pianist turn around on his way to the grocery store?
He forgot his Chopin Liszt.
Why did the jazz musician refuse to be quarantined?
Cause he was an outdoor cat.
Asked a pianist if he could play the Chick Pea Song.
He said, "Maybe. Can you hummus a few bars?"
A piano player got arrested at a wedding...
He was trying to root the relatives.
What is a pianist’s favorite cheese ?
Mozzartrella.