What do you call a Medieval knight who's always sure of himself?
Sir Tainly.
What did the Medieval Gynecologist say to his patients?
At your cervix, m'lady
During the medieval time period, there weren't many extremely bad people. There were only mid-evil people during that age.
I killed all the knights in the Iron Keep, except one,
He was Allone
Which knight is the protector of foods?
Sir Anwrap
What was the favorite pass time of peasants from the medieval time period? They absolutely love to go serfing!
How did knights in the middle-ages get across a moat?
Moataboat
Have you heard of the knight whose enemies were always lurking near him and following him? That knight went by the name of Sir Rounded.
The fattest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference.
He acquired his size from too much pi.
There was this knight who would be always roasting whatever he would catch for food. Guess this is why he was known as the Bonfire Knight.
Why was the medieval knight polishing his dress before going for the Queens's dinner party? Because he wanted to have a night in shining armor!
For the last two weeks my kids have been building a medieval blanket fort every evening to sleep in. Many nights they also stayed up past their bedtime playing fortnight under its protective cover.
It was a night knight fort for Fortnight for a fortnight.
My history teacher was talking about mythical medieval creatures
Personally, I think the lecture was starting to drag on
Knights have always used one type of lamp since medieval times. These lamps are now called Knight Lamps.
What is the name of the device that the king uses to control the moat around his castle? A remoat control.
What do you ask a medieval crustacean when you want them to feel the music?
Art thou feeling it now Mr. Krabs?
These days, knights love to watch movies, and their favorite genre is the horror and the action genre. Also, I am pretty sure that their favorite movie is 'Knight Of The Living Dead.'
Which cheese surrounds a medieval castle?
Moatzarella.
Which English royal family was the smartest?
The Tudors.
Last Christmas, I got my sister a build-it-yourself medieval fort. She wasn't very happy with it, but my mother reprimanded her by saying that it isn't the gift, but the fort that counts!
Did you hear about the medieval kinghunter?
He excelled in throne weapons
What did the king say when he heard that the peasants were revolting? He said he agrees because they never bathe and always stink.
What do you call a Medieval spy?
Sir Veillance
What do you call a medieval dentist?
A plaque doctor.
How do Medieval sheep protest prisons?
They storm the baaaastille.
What is a knight who has traveled all across the earth with a ship known as? He is known as Sir Cumnavigator.
Why couldn't Vivaldi play medieval music?
Because his violin was Baroque
What do you call a cow apart of the Knights of the Round Table?
Sir Loin
What do you think is the name of the knight who unexpectedly turned up at the battle? His name is Sir Prize.
What was written on a knight's headstone?
Rust in peace.
My brother was reading a book about a medieval castle that always had its drawbridge up. Unfortunately, he couldn't really get into the book!
Where does King Arthur throw his stupid knights?
In the Dumbgeon.
A medieval lawyer lost his license and became instead an insult musician for taverns...
His stage name "Diss-Bard"
Did you know that back in medieval times, soldiers would sleep with lanterns next to them so they could see if something happened.
They were called "Knight Lights"
In the medieval ages, chess was a very popular game among Kings and Queens. This was because they had castles in it!
What's the difference between Hanukkah and dragons?
One is eight nights while the other ate knights
Why does England always get attacked in the summer?
Because the Knights are shorter then.
What do you call a medieval siege machine that throws flowers?
A trebouquet
Who was the knight that was very secretive?
Sir Reptitious
What do you call 3 knights in a relationship?
Polyarmory
Why are automatic doors like knights?
Because they're chivalrous!
Why did the king order his new castle be built in the evening?
For the night knights!
How did one become a medieval executioner?
You had to axe nicely.
What were middle-aged parents called in medieval times? Middle-aged parents.
When were Medieval armies too tired to fight?
When they had a lot of sleepless knights!
I googled 'lost medieval servant boy'
The result was 'This page cannot be found.'
Why was the medieval architect always going to the beaches? So that he could build the perfect sandcastle!
For several days each month, some friends and I get together, play instruments and sing in a medieval style.
I guess you could call it my minstrel period.
What was the nickname for the knight who ruled the fort?
"Fortnite"
In the old times, the medieval kings and queens would only visit the dentist just before their coronation. This is because they wanted their teeth crowned!