Did you hear about the medieval kinghunter?
He excelled in throne weapons
I would say that life for the majority of people in the middle ages was rather peasant.
What were middle-aged parents called in medieval times? Middle-aged parents.
Although knights were considered protectors of the realm, they sometimes did get involved in the politics of their time. This was because the knights followed knight-wing politics.
How did murderers hide the body in medieval times?
They start by dragon it.
Dance music can be traced back to medieval times when a farmer dropped some heavy beets.
I accidentally sat on a medieval stained glass window at the antique store...
That was a royal pane in the ass.
In medieval times, what were people who worked in banks known as? They were known as fortune-tellers!
What do you ask a medieval crustacean when you want them to feel the music?
Art thou feeling it now Mr. Krabs?
After which knight is a town in England named? Sir Rey!
What do you think is the name of the knight who unexpectedly turned up at the battle? His name is Sir Prize.
Why was the knight fighting the tournament with a sword made from cheddar cheese? Because the cheese was extra sharp!
There were two knights who were fighting a long duel with each other. The fight ended when one of them chopped off the other's leg- guess the knight was defeeted.
How did explorers hide their treasures in the medieval ages? By dragon them to a safe location.
When does a medieval soldier sleep?
Knight time
What do you call a Medieval spy?
Sir Veillance
What do you call a knight who just wants to fight with an opponent on level grounds? He is called Sir Face!
Why is the Medieval period often called the Dark Ages?
Because there were so many knights.
Once upon a time, a knight hosted a live improvisational comedy show for everyone in town. It was known as 'Saturday Knight Live'.
My sister once took a knight as a dance partner to her high-school party because it was a prom knight.
What's the difference between Hanukkah and dragons?
One is eight nights while the other ate knights
When does a medieval soldier sleep?
Knight time
In the dark ages, the knights had to attend a special type of school. It was the Knight School.
What do you call a knight who is afraid to fight?
Sir Render
When were Medieval armies too tired to fight?
When they had a lot of sleepless knights!
These days, knights love to watch movies, and their favorite genre is the horror and the action genre. Also, I am pretty sure that their favorite movie is 'Knight Of The Living Dead.'
What is the name of the knight that spreads all the rumors and news of the court and the king amongst the people? Sir Culate.
Which cheese surrounds a medieval castle?
Moatzarella.
Santa hit a dragon and killed it whilst flying over medieval England...
... guess you could say he sleighed it
Last Christmas, I got my sister a build-it-yourself medieval fort. She wasn't very happy with it, but my mother reprimanded her by saying that it isn't the gift, but the fort that counts!
If I lived in medieval times, I'd be a tavern guard.
I've always been known for my Inn-Security.
King Arthur had a knight in charge of determining property boundaries.
Sir Veyor
Medieval Kings and Queens were carried by their soldiers and servants. I am not lying, they litter-ally carried that way!
In the medieval ages, many knights had to travel throughout day and night. In order to increase their visibility in darkness, they invented a device known as the knightvision goggles.
Lance is an uncommon name nowadays but in medieval times...
people were called Lance a lot.
What did King Arthur call his sneakiest knight?
Sir Valence.
How do Medieval sheep protest prisons?
They storm the baaaastille.
What did Richard III say when someone asked to build a car park in Leicester?
"Over my dead body!"