Took my giant spoon to my cooking class last night. It caused quite a stir.
I downloaded a colander app instead of a calendar and now my battery keeps draining.
What do Santa’s elves cook with in the kitchen?
A u-tinsel.
Did you know there are exactly 239 beans in Irish stew?
Any more and it would be two farty...
Why did the pony ask for a glass of water?
Because he felt like he was a little horse.
What do you call a very sad cup of coffee?
A depresso.
What do you call a chicken looking at a bowl of lettuce?
Chicken sees a salad.
What is the dish that likes using the light switch?
StrogONOFF
While cooking, I asked my wife if we have any Sage. She said "We have some ground sage"
I asked her "Do we have any sage that's not on the floor?"
Got emotional hearing about the role of tectonic plates in earthquakes. It was really moving.