Son: I was really Hungary and I ate the whole Turkey. There is only Greece left.
Me: I couldn’t Bolivia!
Historians have discovered a new Greek God who didn’t excel at anything.
His name was mediocretese.
What do you call the Greek version of Spider-Man?
Pita Parker.
My son claims that he identifies as an ancient Greek string instrument.
Frankly, I think he's a lyre.
What does a Greek machine need to work?
Greece.
What happens when Greeks come back from war?
They get a gyro’s welcome.
What did Sophocles call his dating service in Ancient Greece?
Oedipal Arrangements.
What do you call a Greek love song?
An Aphro-ditty.
I was at a thrift store and the guy ahead of me was purchasing an antique urn made in Greece
He asked the cashier if she knew how much a Greek urns.
Have you seen the Greek book that became a movie? You odyssey it.
What do you call a Greek philosopher who loves rice?
Arisotto.
I'll be making a movie about the Greek alphabets.
It's a Psi Phi film.
A lot of William Shakespeare’s plays were based off of old Greek and Roman performances
That's playgarism if you ask me.
If Russia attacked Turkey from behind do you think Greece would help?
How did citizens of Ancient Greece measure land for crops?
By Demeter.
How do you get in contact with a Greek architect?
You column.
The Greeks make the best cheese
You feta believe it!
Some people say Greece should stop using the euro as currency...
I think they're being over-drachmatic.
Which ancient Greek Philosopher had a foot fetish?
Play-toe.
Or was it Sock-rates?
Brother: "My friend John is in Greece studying abroad."
My Dad: "What's her name?"
Other people had drugs in school, but I brought Greek cheeses.
That way I could have math and feta cheese.
A company from Israel took over the Greek national cheese factory in Greece
Now it's called the Cheeses of Nazareth.
Why do people in Greece not wake up until noon?
Because Dawn is tough on greece.
Did you know the first French fries weren't actually cooked in France? They were cooked in Greece.
What do you call the Greek God of Mexican chickens?
Apollo
What is the capital of Greece?
G.
What's the name of the machine the ancient greeks used to calculate how best to fight hybrid monsters?
The antichimera mechanism.
How do Greek gods say sorry to one another
"I Apollo-gise"
If you don’t have a lot of figurines from Ancient Greek mythology, I can give you a mini tour.
What sound does a Greek cow make?
"μ"
In Ancient Greece, people who had beliefs contrary to the worship of Poseidon were executed for Heresea.
I can't stand Greek salads.
I like un-feta'd access to my greens.
A few years ago, I had a job translating pre-Classical Greek literature into Braille.
It feels like ancient history.
Who is the most famous actor in Greece ?
John Travolta.
I've been dying to go to Greece on vacation.
But all they serve is bar food.
Son: "Dad, why'd you name me Odysseus? He's from greek mythology."
Dad: "Well son, you broke through the trojan wall."
An ancient Greek walks into his tailor’s shop with a pair of torn pants.
‘’Euripides’’ says the tailor. ‘’Yeah, Eumenides?’’ replies the man.
What's the difference between Greek yogurt and regular yogurt?
Greek yogurt has a rich cultural history.
What did the prehistoric Greeks call their goddess of love?
Troglodite.
I guess you can say my misunderstanding of Greek mythology has always been my Achilles
Elbow.
My son asked me, what’s a Greek urn?
I said, “about 20 drachmas a day.”
What does a Greek God say when they answer the phone?
"Whodisious?"
A soda can, a gas tank and the Greek god Eros walked into a bar?
The bartender shook his head, “Here comes trouble.” A patron at the bar said, “What’s wrong?” The bartender replied, “Those guys get together and they become cantankeros.”
Did you know that the Greek god Chronos was in the Mafia?
He was the Don of Time itself!
In Greek Mythology, Chiron was not only half man and half horse, he was also a doctor of medicine
That made him the centaur for disease control.
What do cows in Greece sound like?
They say µ.
What is a Greek dog’s favorite dessert?
Barklava!