What does a flower say when they’re surprised?
What in carnation!
What do you call a grandpa flower?
Poppy.
Did you hear about the flower who gave an ultimatum to her husband?
She told him once and floral.
Did you hear about one flower who went on a date with another flower?
It’s a budding romance.
What does a flower say when they’re offering you a job?
Take it or leaf it.
Did you hear about the flower who was struck in a hit and run?
She was leafed for dead.
What did the flower say to his wife when he brought her home a present?
I hope thistle cheer you up.
What kind of alcohol do flowers drink?
Rosé.
What does an alcoholic flower say when they reach out for help?
Lilac the ability to stop.
What does a door to door flower salesman do?
Petal his wares.
What is a cactus’ favorite MC Hammer song?
Can’t touch this.
What would Jerry McGuire have said if he was a flower?
You had me at hydrangea.
What did the flower write in his mother’s day card?
I’m proud to be orchid.
Did you hear about the flower who never bloomed?
It was a bud omen.
What does a flower do when they get caught in a lie?
Backpetal.
What was the conversation like at the dinner party with all the boring flowers?
Like pollen teeth.
How many lips does a flower have?
Tulips.