How many wipes does it take to clean a keyboard?
qwsedrftgyhujikolpawesdrtfgyhujikloaszxdcrfvgtbhnjmk,lazsxdcfvgsedtfrgyftg67y78u87u8uii9op[;'';;'/;l/l;.l.k,lkmjkmertyudfghjk12q21q2qw3qwe3we4r45rt6ygerdgfvbwedfcv qwedfscv
So I was in the library when this cute girl came up and asked to borrow my external hard drive
It was at this point I realized she wanted the (D:)
Dancing Queen used to have a lot of profanity in its lyrics, but after computers became common
No-one needed an ABBA cuss
Where do the keys on a keyboard go to have a good time
The spacebar.
My computer was running pretty hot
Until I downloaded some fan art, and now it's working better.
What happens when you turn on a computer?
You turn it's floppy disk into a hard disk.
Did you hear about the new Wifi connected chef's knife?
It's cutting-edge technology.
He couldn't get over his dead wife, so he got a new computer
Now he can processor.
What do computers do on a beach vacation?
Surf the net.
What's the sketchiest button combo on a computer keyboard?
Shift + T
Used to never be able to use the WiFi at my farm until I moved my router to the barn.
Now I have a stable connection.
Why did the computer spy get fired?
She couldn't hack it.
What do you call a gushing keyboard?
sqwerty
German Wi-Fi is the WURST.
My Wifi password is "writtenontherouter"
And I let all my guests walk to the router and let them unsuccessfully try to use the initial password until I tell them it's literally "writtenontherouter".
I'm really obsessed with the F1 key on my keyboard. I'm trying to get help.
Why do microwaves always mess up WiFi...
...when every one I've tried creates hotspots?
My keyboard fell apart today.
I feel like I'm losing Ctrl of everything.
'what's the Wifi password?'
'Its for security'
'Haha, yes, I know that. But what's the password?'.
'No, it's 'forsecurity'. All one word, lower case.'.
Entered what I ate today into my new fitness app and it just sent an ambulance to my house.
My doctor must think I have a bad hard drive
He said he needed to C:
In an attempt to deter computer hackers I've changed all my passwords to 'Brazil Nut'
That will be a hard one to crack.
Was going to change my password to MilkyTea but apparently that's too weak.
Why do computers make such bad boxers?
Their bark is worse than their byte.
Why are boy keyboards scared of girl keyboards?
They don't want to get qwerties.
How do you type the word "Royalty" on a keyboard?
You start with the higher R key.
Someone vandalized my keyboard leaving only 1 button.
Surprisingly, the police were more thorough in the investigation than I expected. They even asked to see my colon.
People need to be careful about computers at all times because they byte.
Did you hear about the new WiFi connected chef's knife?
It's cutting-edge technology.
My wife asked: "What's our WiFi?"
I said: It's an internet connection that works wirelessly through something called a modem. Why?"
She hasn't spoken to me all week.
I left my laptop outside on the picnic table, and when I came back, the keyboard was covered in ants...
...It took a while to herd them together but I finally got them all under control.
What's one of the worst things you could come across while surfing the web?
Your keyboard.
The computer wanted to get out of the house, so it used the Windows.
I was testing the speaker phone on the intercom on our landline with my father yesterday.
It started to make that annoying noise. My old man said it was too close to call.
Why did the hard drive crash?
Because it had a bad driver.
V
V
Edit*: sorry it seems as the CTRL button on my keyboard isn't working
Just can't get away from my broken keyboard. There's no escape.
Are you WiFi?
Because I can feel the connection between us.
I fell asleep on my phone the other day. It downloaded a nap.
Asked the librarian rather loudly for the wifi password. He said "Sshhhhhh!" I asked "is that all lower case?"
Changed my password to fortnight but apparently that's two week.
How big is a clown's hard drive?
50 GiggleBytes
The rancher's Wifi wasn't working so he moved the router to the barn...
Now he has a stable connection
Why did the computer squeak? Because someone stepped on its mouse!
Why can't an IT guy keep a girlfriend?
He turns them all off and on again.
My computer crashed and I lost all the notes I'd saved for the book I'm working on called "1,001 cures for itches."
I guess I'll have to start again from scratch.
Where are dramatic hard drives from?
Oh I/O
I just lost a key on my keyboard
Now its all out of control.
I dropped my computer on my foot.
It mega-hurts.
I didn't know WiFi stood for Wireless Fidelity.
I guess I just didn't get the connection.