Where do all the cool mice live? In their mousepads.
I always love pressing F5 on my keyboard.
It's so refreshing.
I told my boss, "Sorry I'm late. I was having computer issues."
Boss: Hard drive?
Me: No, the commute was fine. It's my laptop.
I imagine eventually there will be a day when we have a WiFi hotspot on Mt. Everest.
Only then will we reach peak internet.
My dog ate my computer science homework.
It took him a couple of bytes.
What is the favorite snack of a programmer, it's undoubtedly Cadbury bytes.
Up until now, I always thought that all the cool mice would get together and live in my mousepad. Now when I know the truth, I feel quite broken.
The oldest computer was an apple given to Adam and Eve back in paradise lost, but it came with very limited memory of just 1 byte. And then everything crashed.
Q. What did the computer say to the cookie?
A. "Can I have your chocolate chip?"
Are you WiFi?
Because I can feel the connection between us.
Did you hear about the Wi-Fi wedding?
The ceremony was awful, but the reception was great!
My sister's laptop is so sassy and fun, it loves to play disc-o music.
What did the WiFi router say when it was unplugged?
"Tell my wifi love her
My computer crashed and I lost all the notes I'd saved for the book I'm working on called "1,001 cures for itches."
I guess I'll have to start again from scratch.
I'm really obsessed with the F1 key on my keyboard. I'm trying to get help.
On a keyboard, nothing is under control.
I couldn't stop laughing when my father warned my brother, saying, "If you hack my Microsoft Office, I will find you, you have my Word".
What happens when you turn on a computer?
You turn it's floppy disk into a hard disk.
What did the baby computer call its father?
Data.
Someone vandalized my keyboard leaving only 1 button.
Surprisingly, the police were more thorough in the investigation than I expected. They even asked to see my colon.
I heard that starting next year, keyboards will no longer be sold with italics...
But it was a bold-faced lie.
Did you hear about the new Wifi connected chef's knife?
It's cutting-edge technology.
Today I Learned I should NOT have my password be the name of my cat.
I then turned to my cat and said, "Well, wJ:cg/v&A;6BTt, I guess it's back to the drawing board."
The computer said my password needed at least eight characters and at least one number, so I changed it to Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.
I left my laptop outside on the picnic table, and when I came back, the keyboard was covered in ants...
...It took a while to herd them together but I finally got them all under control.
My wife told me she'll slam my head on the keyboard if I don't get off the computer.
I'm not too worried, I think she's jokinlkjhfakljn m,.nbziyoao78yv87dfaoyuofaytdf.
My computer is so slow it's running in the '90s.
I didn't know WiFi stood for Wireless Fidelity.
I guess I just didn't get the connection.
Why did the man get so sad his computer had a virus?
It was a terminal illness.
What made the computer so smart?
Because he listened to his motherboard!
Why did the keyboard not get any sleep?...
Because it has two shifts.
My kid asked why I named our WiFi "ship"?
But that's how everything syncs.
I've got no home, I haven't got control, and I can't see any escape.
I should get a new keyboard.
I want anarchy
Because my keyboard is missing one.
The FBI are raiding an alleged spy's apartment when they discover a hard drive labeled "KGB".
One of the agents holds it up with a look of confusion and says, "Why wouldn't he just write 1 TB?"
Q. Why couldn't the dinosaur play games on the computer?
A. Because he ate the mous
My doctor must think I have a bad hard drive
He said he needed to C:
Hardcore programmers will agree that neither of them would use AC because they all prefer to open windows.
My mom told me that sitting on a computer 8 hours a day in unhealthy
I said: But, mom that's why I am using a chair.
Today my "O" button on my keyboard stopped working.
Maybe it was a sign I should've stopped o-ppressing the keyboard.
What's one of the worst things you could come across while surfing the web?
Your keyboard.
What do you call a solar powered keyboard?
A photosynthesiser
German Wi-Fi is the WURST.
Q. What happened when the computer geeks met?
A. It was love at first site!
How did the computer hackers get away from the scene of crime?
They just ransomware.
Why do you need a password to make a camp fire?
So you can log in.
My father said that there was a bug on my computer. The bug was trying to eat one byte at a time.
Why was the computer late to work? Because it had a hard drive!
Computers can be very good at golf because of their hard drives.
Why was the IT guy in the hospital?
He touched the firewall.