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Sat Jokes

Laundry Puns
After buying grocers, I sat on the San Francisco pier and pondered life. My laundry detergent tipped over...
Now I’m sittin on the dock of a bay, watching my Tide roll away.
Bacon Puns
Did you hear about the butcher who sat on his bacon slicer?
He got a little behind in his deliveries.
Old McDonald's Farm
Two Army football players were given a special SAT test to meet their admission requirements to the Military Academy. Soon after the test began the first guy turns to the second guy and asks, “Old MacDonald had a what?” The other replies, “He had a farm.” The first asks, “How do you spell it?” To which the second replied, “E-I-E-I-O.”
Mother Puns
I had a real problem when your mom got rid of that crooked chair my dad made.
I don't know why, it just never sat right with me.
Monster Puns
What happened to the skeleton who sat by the fire for too long?
He became bone dry.
Werewolf Puns
What did the werewolf say when he sat on sandpaper?
- Ruff!
Italy Puns
I bought a 400 year-old chair from Italy,
but as soon as I sat on it, it baroque.
Zebra Puns
I was driving through the safari park when my sat nav said “bear left”. It was clearly a zebra.
Couch Puns
My husband hated my impulse purchase of a revolving chair, but then he sat on it.
Eventually he came around.
Witch Puns
What did the tired witch do?
She sat down for a spell.
Train Puns
Did you hear about the man who sat next to his clone on the train?
He was beside himself.
Funny Work Quotes
“The only thing that ever sat its way to success was a hen.” — Sarah Brown
One Liners and Short Jokes
A blonde walked into the dentist office and sat down in a chair.
The dentist said "Open Wide" "I can't" The blonde said. "This chair has arms"
Medieval Puns
I accidentally sat on a medieval stained glass window at the antique store...
That was a royal pane in the ass.
Utensils Puns
My wife got a straw for her drink...
When she sat down, she took a sip, and frustratedly sighed "My straw has a hole in it!"
I replied "I should hope it has two!"
Pea Puns
I sat on some peas in the car. It was a bumpea ride.