Which baseball player makes the best pancakes?
The batter.
How can you tell a vampire likes baseball? Every night he turns into a bat.
Which position does the son of Dracula play on the baseball team?
Bat boy.
Why don't matches play baseball?
Because one strike, and they're out.
How do baseball players stay in contact with each other?
They touch base every once in a while.
Why did the horny duck circle the baseball field?
She hoped to catch some fowl balls.
Why don't orphans make good baseball players?
Because they don't know where home is.
The winning home run didn't surprise the hitter. He did it all without batting an eye.The baseball player loved his treadmill and all the home runs.
A spectator at a baseball game wondered why the ball kept getting bigger and bigger. Then, it hit him.
What do you get if cross a baseball player and a monster?
A double header.
What happens if you read too many Painful baseball Puns?
You're left in stitches.
What has 18 legs, spits a lot, and catches flies?
A baseball team.
What are the rules in zebra baseball?
Three stripes, and you're out.
How are baseball umpires and angry chickens alike?
Both make fowl calls.
Which classical Greek may have actually invented baseball?
Homer.
Why were there cows on the baseball field?
Because they were looking for the bullpen.
Why did DPD rush to Coors Field?
They heard somebody stole third base.
Why are frogs great outfielders?
Because they never miss a fly.
Which cartoon character is the best at baseball?
Homer Simpson.
What do baseball players eat their backyard BBQ on?
Home plates.
What did the mitt say to the baseball?
Hey baby, you're quite a catch.
What do baseball players eat at White Castle?
Sliders.
Why did a baseball player decide to take a job at a used car lot during his off season?
He wanted to work on his sales pitch.
Why did the pirate captain want to hire a baseball player?
He knew he had a chest protector.
Why did the baseball player decide to shut down his website?
It just wasn't getting any hits.
What did they call Dracula after his team won the big game?
The Champire.
What do you get if you cross a baseball pitcher and a carpet?
A throw rug.
What's the best advice to give to a young baseball player?
If you don't suceed at first, try second base.
Who wrote the fantasy novel How To Be A Better Baseball Player?
Ben Schwarmer.
Why was the baseball player so good at writing advertising jingles?
Because they're so catchy.
Why are some umpires fat?
Because they always clean the plate.
Baseball point to ponder: Why do we sing "Take Me Out To The Ball Game" at the ballpark, if we're already there?
When the baseball team chose an owl masot, did they get a designated hooter?
What did the mathematician do at the baseball game?
Square root for the home team.