Do baseball players ever wear armor?
Only during knight games.
When the baseball team chose an owl masot, did they get a designated hooter?
Why did DPD rush to Coors Field?
They heard somebody stole third base.
What has 18 legs, spits a lot, and catches flies?
A baseball team.
What did the mitt say to the baseball?
Hey baby, you're quite a catch.
Which Star Wars movie is a baseball player's least favorite?
The Umpire Strikes Back.
Why was the mummy added to the game as a pinch hitter?
Because the manager knew he could wrap it up.
Baseball point to ponder: Why do we sing "Take Me Out To The Ball Game" at the ballpark, if we're already there?
When his wife was preparing his favorite chocolate cake, the baseball player said "Batter Up.
Did you hear the joke about the pop fly? Oh, nevermind. It was over your head...
Why are some umpires fat?
Because they always clean the plate.
The winning home run didn't surprise the hitter. He did it all without batting an eye.The baseball player loved his treadmill and all the home runs.
A baseball walks into a bar. The bartender throws him out.
What's the difference between a high-hit baseball and a maggot's father?
One is a pop fly and the other is a fly pop.
Why was the nice guy such a lousy baseball player?
Because he never got to home base.
What do you get if you cross a baseball pitcher and a carpet?
A throw rug.
How do baseball players stay in contact with each other?
They touch base every once in a while.
What are the rules in zebra baseball?
Three stripes, and you're out.
Why was the baseball player so good at writing advertising jingles?
Because they're so catchy.
How are ladies' baseball teams and cupcakes alike?
Both are delicious and depend on a good batter.
Which author is anxious to write the book: Colorado Rockies, World Series Champs?
Ben Whayten.
Why did the horny duck circle the baseball field?
She hoped to catch some fowl balls.
What do baseball players eat their backyard BBQ on?
Home plates.
Why do gnomes like baseball? Gnome Runs.
Why did the baseball team recruit a tiny ghost?
Because they needed a little team spirit.
What do you call a winged insect that hits home runs?
A fly swatter.
What do you get if cross a baseball player and a monster?
A double header.
Why did the pirate captain want to hire a baseball player?
He knew he had a chest protector.
What keeps the beat in a baseball song?
The bass line.
What's the best advice to give to a young baseball player?
If you don't suceed at first, try second base.
Why did the vampire strike out?
He used the wrong bat.
If somebody says "You pitch great for a southpaw," is that a left-handed compliment?
How do recreational league baseball players stay so cool?
They sit among their fans.
How can you tell a vampire likes baseball? Every night he turns into a bat.