Hilarious White Lies Parents Tell Kids

By: Helena M.

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What is the difference between a white lie and a lie-lie? It’s not a rare occurrence that parents lie to their children in order to get them to behave a certain way or to support the belief in magical beings like Santa Claus and the tooth fairy. Is that really so wrong? Opinions on the matter are split. According to some child care experts, if a child catches a parent in a lie, it is very important that the parent owns up to it and makes up for it. If you’re trying to teach your child lying is wrong you have to admit it’s also wrong when adults do it.

Harmless or not, the white lies some of us believed as kids are the source of some hilarious stories. This list contains some of the best ones we came across. Not only is it funny, but it might also be a fun throwback to your own childhood because apparently, some parent lies are just classics.

1. Eating

When the ice cream van plays music, it means they’re out of ice cream.
You Can’t eat cake 5 minutes before bed, because it’ll give you nightmares.
On the morning after Halloween, the candy fairy comes in and eats all the leftover candy.
Calamaris are Italian onion rings, and fish is ‘Argentinian chicken’.
Not only do carrots make you see in the dark, if you don’t eat them you will go blind!
One very marketing oriented mom laid out all the candy out in the open with free access for the children, but hid all the vegetables. And it worked! According to her now-grown son, vegetables became a luxury to the point where her son tells he asked for Brussels sprouts for his birthday, instead of cake.

2. Bedtime

If you’re not asleep in 15 minutes I will come check on you.
When on a long and tiring drive you can always use: ‘if you fall asleep, we’ll take the shortcut’.
Many kids are afraid of monsters at night. One mum solved this problem by giving her daughter a potato masher magic stick to keep by her side when she goes to bed, to ward off any monsters.
If you fall asleep wearing anything other than your pajamas, the Jammie Police will come and arrest you.
The Internet Lady turns the connection off at 6 pm every night.

3. Behaving in the Car

If you misbehave during a ride, the car gets sad and you should apologize to it.
Some kids believe that they have a lost sibling, who was dropped off by the side of the road because he was being too loud in the car…
The car won’t start unless everyone has their seatbelts on.

4. General Fact Bending

The TV only works when it rains.
Whenever the kids want something beyond reason, just ask them to lick their elbow. If they can do it they win.
Every person has a 10,000 word limit per month. Once the words are used up, that person can’t physically speak until the next month. Talkative kids should be very careful.
Toys grow under the weeds in the yard. If the weeds are pulled out, a toy eventually might pop up.
Brown M&Ms are only for adults, so whenever you find one you need to give it to mom or dad.
Babies are bought from the hospital. Women needed to get really fat before purchasing one, to prove they can afford to eat well and thus afford to raise a baby.

Sources: Parents, Reddit