My friend sailed his yacht into the wharf very rapidly, crashing into the dock and causing a dent in the hull.
It's just a berth mark, he swears.
Did you hear about the boat that crashed into the beach?
The captain fell asleep and the crew didn't realize until they were already in the no wake zone.
I knew a guy in jail who would never knife a man in the back or when he was down
He was the very model of shivalry.
Guns don’t kill people...
Bullets, it’s bullets that kill people.
Why did Immanuel Kant lend his machine gun to forces plotting a military coup?
Because he willed that his Maxim could make a general rule.
Why don't they make boats out of peppers?
Because they're always capsaicin!
My writer buddy went to buy a new boat...
He named it Penman-Ship.
why was the ship called 3.14
because it was full of π-rates.
If I ever get drafted into the Navy, and they make me choose what boat to get on.
I would just say frig it.
I love driving my car, makes me feel like I'm charge of a big boat
especially when it's on cruise control
I can row a boat.
Canoe?
What do you call a Monkey with a bomb
A baboom.
What is one way to save money when you go to the lake?
Buy a “sale boat.”
What do you call a selfish bomb?
Mine.
I got fired from the bomb disposal squad
Too bad, I had a blast working there.
The knife that Abraham used to kill Isaac has been found in Britain.
Apparently, it was a Dyson.
I’m sure my wife has been putting glue on my weapons collection.
She denies it, but I’m sticking to my guns.
What gun does a military chef use?
A salt rifle.