I asked my son to go get me a phone book. He laughed, called me a dinosaur, and handed me his iPhone.
The spider is dead, the iPhone screen is cracked, and my son is furious!
I joined a support group for former computer hackers.
Anonymous Anonymous.
I took all the punctuation marks off of the judge's keyboard.
I expect a long sentence.
I told my boss, "Sorry I'm late. I was having computer issues."
Boss: Hard drive?
Me: No, the commute was fine. It's my laptop.
Why didn't the cell phone wear his glasses? He lost his contacts.
I came into the office early and switched as many M and N keys on keyboards as I could. Some might say I'm a monster...
But others will say nomster
How did the mobile phone propose to his girlfriend?
He gave her a ring
I had no one to help me when my computer and phone mutinied
I was left to my own devices.
Q. Why couldn't the dinosaur play games on the computer?
A. Because he ate the mous
I almost got in trouble because I tried to talk to someone in the same room as me over the phone...
...It was a close call.
My Wifi password is "writtenontherouter"
And I let all my guests walk to the router and let them unsuccessfully try to use the initial password until I tell them it's literally "writtenontherouter".
How does a computer learn something new?
Bit by bit.
How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
None because it's a hardware issue.
I was waiting at the hotel's lobby when the WiFi was disconnecting from time to time.
I really hated that reception.
I wanted to do some research on organs in biology, but I had no WiFi and couldn't find the information I wanted.
I wound up using cellular.
What is an unlimited phone plan? A limit cannot be charged.
Why did the computer squeak? Because someone stepped on its mouse!
My dad enjoys writing jokes and storing them on my phone. He calls it his Dad-a-base.
Someone just called my phone, sneezed and then just hung up.
I am getting sick and tired of these cold calls.
My kid asked why I named our WiFi "ship"?
But that's how everything syncs.
How big is a clown's hard drive?
50 GiggleBytes
I asked the librarian for the new book on erectile dysfunction.
She typed on her keyboard and said "It's not coming up!"
I said "Yeah, that's the one!!"
How does the cell phone call his girlfriend on Valentine's Day? He gives her a ring.
My computer is so slow it's running in the '90s.
In a world without fences and walls, who needs Gates and Windows?
Which hard drive is always the happiest?
Disk C:
My sister's laptop is so sassy and fun, it loves to play disc-o music.
An American guy visits a friend in Scotland.
When he arrives at his friend's house, he asks "Can I use your Wifi?"
The friend looks a bit perplexed, but then he smiles and says, "Sure ye can, she's up th' stairs."
What did the phone say to begin the race?
On your marks, handset, go!
I want anarchy
Because my keyboard is missing one.
What do you call a program that uses every possible combination to crack a password?
A battering R.A.M.