SpaceX is launching astronauts today with a new space catapult
Bringing forth a new era of crude spaceflight.
What is the best way to observe the two planets between Jupiter and Neptune?
Saturn Uranus.
Libya changed its plain green flag to a crescent moon, but I think they'll change it back.
It's only a phase, after all.
What do you call an alien spaceship that goes from planet to planet to planet? A UF-hoe.
What do you think walking on the moon is like?
Not very impactful.
How will you have communion in the space if you won’t have mass?
How do planets staying busy during hunting season?
By shooting stars.
How does a quarter moon always feel?
Crestfallen.
Why does the earth appreciate the moon so much?
It keeps the oceans tidy.
Do you know what is the favorite key of the astronauts?
The Spacebar.
Sun to Earth, on the night of 31st December:
"Let's have another round, shall we?"
What kind of tropical fruit wants to visit the moon?
A Coco-naut
An astronaut who normally fails on a weightlessness experiment, might surely be aware of the gravity of the situation.
The earth's rotation really makes my day.
What will you call a crazy spaceman? An astronaut.
What do you call an alien with three eyes?
An aliiien.
Why don't pets make good astronauts?
They're afraid of the spay station
How will you make the earth clean? By giving it a meteor shower.
If athletes can get “Athletes foot”, what can astronauts get? Missile Toe.
An astronaut did a huge crime. He broke the law of gravity and hence, got a suspended sentence.
What does Earth get on Earth day ?
A birthday quake !
Flat-Earthers hate the fact our planet is spherical, whereas Asgard is flat.
It's a Thor subject for them.
"Dad, can you tell me what a solar eclipse is?"
"No sun."
I thought about studying the astronomy for my university. But then I thought, I would just be taking up space.
What ingredient is essential when baking a Star Wars cake?
Bicarbonate of Yoda
Why does a Moon-rock taste better than an Earth-rock?
Because it's a little meteor.
There’s a big thunderstorm. The road is blocked by a big mudslide. A little boy asks his dad, “Why does earth fall down like that?”
His dad answers, “It’s terrain.”
"Hi, I'm Buzz Aldrin. Second person to step on the moon.
Neil before me."
When a planet dies, does it get an orbituary?
Why did the cosmonaut take his dog to the vet?
He came down with a stellar case of lunar tics.
It is difficult to hold up a trouser. How does Jupiter does it? Simply, with an asteroid belt.
Why does Venus have a crush on the sun?
Because the sun is really hot.
What do the astronauts put on their lunch toast? Space jam.
What's E.T. short for?
Because he's got little legs.
Wanna know a way for werewolves to howl other than the full moon?
Make them stub their toe.
Last night I was but by a bloodsucker from the moon.
Damn lunatics.
How does the sun say hi to the moon?
With a heat wave!
What spread do astronauts use on their toast?
. . . Space jam
When NASA will put 20 heads of cattle into the outer space, it will be the 1st herd shot around the entire world.
A space fish is usually called starfish.
What do planets like to read?
Comet books.
Tomorrow the planet will be one year older..
Happy bEarthday!
What do you call people who go to space? Icetronauts.
What are the best kind of flowers to get your girlfriend after screwing up?
Whoopsie Daisies
People gave the sun a rating.
It was only one star.
Mooning is very ASStrological
What do you call an overweight alien?
An extra cholesterol.
What do you call the Earth when it is quaking?
Shakesphere.
Becoming a space pilot is not easy. It requires a good altitude.
Got my friend an unnecessarily large rocket for bonfire night.
He's over the moon!He's over the moon!