Why do astronauts use linux?
because you can't open windows in space.
An astronaut who normally fails on a weightlessness experiment, might surely be aware of the gravity of the situation.
Whats the first day of the week called in outer space?
Moonday.
What is the angriest place on Earth?
Ire-land
Warning! Do not look at the sun through a colander.
You'll strain your eyes.
How did the space criminal escape from the prison planet?
He achieved escape velocity.
Have you heard the one about the spaceship that came to Earth?
Never mind its over your head.
Why does NASA give astronauts pencils to use in space?
Because they've got the Write Stuff.
What do you call an alien spaceship that's leaking water?
A crying saucer.
What do you call an alien with three eyes?
An aliiien.
Have you found the center of gravity yet? It’s the letter v.
Why should the Sun get into a school? To get brighter.
Can’t wait for the first married woman to walk on the red planet.
Just so I can ask if there’s wife on Mars.
I’m currently reading a book on anti-gravity and it’s impossible to put it down.
Where do Astronauts go to the bathroom?
Where no one has gone before.
A sun walks into a black hole.
The black hole says to the sun "I don't think you understand the gravity of this situation".
What kind of magazines would the planets prefer to read? Cosmos.
What holds the moon up?
Moonbeams!
I would have gone to space, but the cost is astronomical!
What are the best kind of flowers to get your girlfriend after screwing up?
Whoopsie Daisies
When astronauts die, the local papers run an orbituary.
What did Earth say to the other planets?
Wow you guys have no life.
What various kinds of fishes live in space? Starfish.
What is the best day to go to the beach? Sunday, of course!
What did Mars tell to Saturn? Give me a ring sometime!
What will a space turkey say to another one? Hubble Hubble.
Why do you think is the moon bald? Because it has no ‘air.
Flat-Earthers hate the fact our planet is spherical, whereas Asgard is flat.
It's a Thor subject for them.
Libya changed its plain green flag to a crescent moon, but I think they'll change it back.
It's only a phase, after all.
Scientists have found that the center of Jupiter… has the letter i.
How many ears do you think a Spock has? Three. A right ear, left ear, and a final front ear.
What do you call a person really crazy about the moon
A lunatic.
I could have been an astronaut...
but my parents told me the sky was the limit.
Why did the Sun never got into college? Because it already has quite a million degrees!
What do moon people do after they get married?What do moon people do after they get married?
Go on their honeyearth.
Did you hear about the astronaut who stepped in gum?
He got stuck in Orbit.
Have you heard about some bones on the moon? Looks like the cow couldn’t make it after all.
If an astronaut steps on chewing gum then what will happen to him? He will simply be stuck on the Orbit.
Do you know why no one has ever been sentenced for crimes committed on the moon?
Because it's a gray area.
It is difficult to hold up a trouser. How does Jupiter does it? Simply, with an asteroid belt.