A sun walks into a black hole.
The black hole says to the sun "I don't think you understand the gravity of this situation".
Have you heard the one about the spaceship that came to Earth?
Never mind its over your head.
Have you heard about the chef on space station? He’s not that much of an astronaut, but his food is literally out of this world!
Where do aliens park their flying saucers?
At a parking meteor.
How did the aliens hurt the farmer?
They trod on his corn.
Why did the cow go right up to the spaceship? To see the Mooooooooooon.
Mountains aren't just funny.
They're hill areas.
What do planets like to read?
Comet books.
What’s the suns favorite clothes brand?
Kelvin Klein.
How does one astronaut says sorry on the moon tell another astronaut? He Apollo-gises.
There’s a lot of proposals on cleaning up space in earth’s orbit from broken satellites.
Looks like they’ll need a vacuum cleaner.
Where do astronauts go for lunch?
Apollo Loco.
How much far can you see with your naked eyes, on a clear day? 92,955,807 miles (to the sun).
What will you do when you will see a spaceman? You will simply park your car, man!
Old astronomers got so tired of waiting for the sun to go down, that they decided to pack it up and call it a day.
Why do astronauts use linux?
because you can't open windows in space.
Dud you know Astronauts said steaks are better in space?
They're a little meteor.
Did you hear about the restaurant they built on the moon?
The food is good but it lacks atmosphere.
What will a space turkey say to another one? Hubble Hubble.
What do you call a meal from the moon?
A satellite dish.
What do moon people do after they get married?What do moon people do after they get married?
Go on their honeyearth.
My daughter asked me, "Why are the two planets coming close together?"
"Well, you see... When two planets love each other they can come together in holy astro nomy."
How did the space criminal escape from the prison planet?
He achieved escape velocity.
He knew literally everything about the constellations. Some might even say that his knowledge of the night sky was astronomical.
What did Mars tell to Saturn? Give me a ring sometime!
Last evening I walked up the hill in the park to see the planets. Stumbled over a lip in the concrete and went down pretty hard. Ripped pants and skinned hands and knees. When I got to the top I couldn't see a thing.
The view was NOT worth the trip.
How do astronauts cook their meals?
With a Space Heater!
What does Earth get on Earth day ?
A birthday quake !
Living on Earth might be expensive. But we surely get a free trip around the sun every year!
Well, there are mixed reviews. People say the food is great. But there is no atmosphere or ambience.
Scientists permit us to see the sun in different light.
I could have been an astronaut...
but my parents told me the sky was the limit.
My wife just yelled that I should fall in a pit or hole sunk into the earth to reach a supply of water and die.
I know she means well.
Why is the moon so conceited at times?
It becomes full of itself.
Why does a Moon-rock taste better than an Earth-rock?
Because it's a little meteor.
I've finally started to believe that Pluto is not really a planet...
Especially when I saw him in a cartoon.
I debated a flat earther once. He stormed off saying he’d walk to the edge of the Earth to prove me wrong.
He’ll come around eventually.
Whats the first day of the week called in outer space?
Moonday.
What do you call an alien with three eyes?
An aliiien.
Why does NASA give astronauts pencils to use in space?
Because they've got the Write Stuff.
Scientists have found that the center of Jupiter… has the letter i.
What do you call people who go to space? Icetronauts.
How does a Man cut his hair on the moon? Eclipse it.
What do you think holds the moon up? Moonbeams.
What type of elements know everybody on earth?
Met-all.
Which channels do the asteroids like to watch? The comet-y channel.
How will you save yourself if you come across an aggressive alien? Give him some space.
Have you heard about some bones on the moon? Looks like the cow couldn’t make it after all.
Why did the Sun never got into college? Because it already has quite a million degrees!
How do astronauts prepare for a birthday party
They planet.