Mobile phones have been around longer than people think.
I was watching this film the other day and heard Sir Lancelot ask someone to fetch his charger.
My husband asked me to sync his phone. So I threw it in the sea - not sure why he is upset.
I phoned OK magazine the other day. They answered and said "Hello?", so I said "Sorry, wrong number," and hung up.
What is a phone's favorite TV show? Game of Phones.
Why don't birds make cell phone calls? They might accidentally wing the wrong number.
I deleted all my German friends from my cell phone contact list.
Now I'm Hanns free.
Autocorrect has become my worst enema.
You know you're texting too much when...
you try to text, but you're on a landline!
You might be able to use a smuggled cell phone in prison.
You just have to have cell coverage.
Why does Mr. Potato need a cell phone? Incase Mr. Onion Rings.
Why did the telecommuter quit her job? Because talk is cheap.
Since getting sober, I decided to go with the cheapest cell phone provider I can find!
Way fewer bars!!!
How does a pirate communicate? With his aye phone.
I asked my son to go get me a phone book. He laughed, called me a dinosaur, and handed me his iPhone.
The spider is dead, the iPhone screen is cracked, and my son is furious!
Wel'l Wel'l Wel'l - if it isn't autocorrect.
Why did the telecommuter lose his job? He had to many hang ups.
What did the girl say when she got a fake call? "I think that call was phoney".
Why didn't the cell phone wear his glasses? He lost his contacts.
I was on the phone with my wife and said, "I'm almost home, honey, please put the coffee maker on." After a twenty-second pause, I asked, "You still there, sweetheart?"
"Yeah," she replied. "But I don't think the coffee maker wants to talk right now"
What did the thrifty man say when he got his phone bill? "Who says talk is cheap?"
Cell phones are a static symbol.
Did you hear about the monkeys who shared an Amazon account?
They were Prime mates!
Why did the hobbit set his cell phone to vibrate?
He was afraid the ring would give him away.
I did it! Dad said to save my money til my balance looks like a phone number.....
Available balance: $9.11.
Why did a pirate leave the boat to get his forgotten cell phone? Booty calls.
I like to write jokes down and store them on my phone, so that I can tell them to him later.
I call it my Dad-abase.
What do a phone and an engaged girl have in common? They both have rings.
The umpire kept answering his phone during the softball game.
He said he didn't want to miss any calls.
How did Sam win the talent show? Sam-sung.
What group of people always had the highest cell phone bills?
The Romans.
4G, or not 4G, that is the question.
What do you call a loud conversation? A megaphone.
I want to tell you one more painful phone pun but I decided it's uncalled for.
I swear I was born in the wrong generation. Nowadays everyone is addicted to their phones.
I wish I was born in the 80's when everyone was addicted to Cocaine.
I fell asleep on my phone the other day. It downloaded a nap.
My wife and I got married under a cell phone tower.
The ceremony wasn't great, but the reception was perfect.
What do you call a bald spot on a cell phone salesperson?
A gap in coverage.
You didn't hear the joke about cell phones?
Probably because it had a bad reception.
What is a tiny cell phone called? A microphone.
What did the therapist say to the angry client when their cell phone battery died?
I suggest you find an outlet!
I named my phone "The Titanic" because it's always syncing.
I left my phone under my pillow last night and woke up to coins underneath it. It must have been the Blue-tooth fairy.
Someone just called my phone, sneezed and then just hung up.
I am getting sick and tired of these cold calls.
Why don't skeletons have a mobile? They don't have any body to talk to.
Just received Areal Flood Advisory notification on my phone
I should hope it's a real one, the fake ones are just annoying.
What is an unlimited phone plan? A limit cannot be charged.