my nose starts bleeding at eleven every night
but I’ve seen stranger things.
A person with a very blocked nose walks into a doctors office.
The doctor says: "So, you're having mucus problems?"
The person replies: "perhaps, perhaps snot.
A nose visited its home town.
It was overcome with nostril-gia.
When you’re smooching with your honey, and your nose is kinda runny, you may think it’s kinda funny, but it snot.
My wife made beef stew to clear my stuffed nose...
...bud I don'd dink it was strogonoff.
You know, people say they pick their nose,
but I feel like I just was born with mine.
“My Dog has no nose. How does he smell?”
"Awful.”
A quadriplegic man became famous playing beautiful piano classics with only his nose, ears, chin, and forehead.
Before going on stage to perform, his tour manager would say, "Alright John. It's time to face the music."
What do you call a man with no body and no nose?
Nobody knows
What did Dr. Frankenstein say when Pinocchio’s nose grew?
"IT’S A LIEEEEE!!"
What do you do if your nose goes on strike?
Picket.
Why can't your nose be 12 inches long?
Because then it'd be a foot!
Where are noses made?
At the olfactory.
What comes out of your nose at 200 mph?
Lambogreeny.
If a T-Rex slipped and broke its nose would it would need a dinoplasty?
You can pick your friends or you can pick your nose...
but you can't pick your friend's nose.
Why is the nose in the middle of the face?
Because it's the scenter.
What do you call a person with a peg nose acting suspicious?
Suspeg.
My barrista friend turns up her nose at instant coffee.
She's quite sankamonious.
My head hurt and I had a really runny nose during math class
I think i had a sin(x) infection.