What do you yell at two mummies making out in public?
Get a tomb!
What type of food do mummies like?
Chicken wraps.
Q: What do you get when you cross an Egyptian pharaoh with a mechanic?
A: Toot and Car Man.
Q: When is a Pharaoh like a piece of wood?
A: When he's a ruler.
The photographer mummy was done with his shoot. So he told his crew to wrap it up.
What would the Egyptian doctor tell to the wife of the Egyptian Pharaoh? He said that she was going to become a mummy.
Why wasn't the archaeologist interested in girls?
Because he only dated mummies.
Did you hear about the Pharaoh who was lying in the wrong coffin? He made a grave mistake.
What did the thirsty mummy do?
They put on a thirst aid bandage.
Why did the pharaoh go to the dentist?
Egypt his tooth.
Q: Why are mummies such great spies?
A: They keep things under wraps
Why do mummies never go on vacations? Because they're afraid to unwind.
A lot of people don't like movies about mummies. I think they get a bad wrap.
What do you call a Pharaoh who plays the trumpet? Tootin'khamun.
What do you call a mummy covered in chocolate and nuts? A Pharaoh Roche.
Archeologists say that mummies are very hard to find. Because they're all kept under wraps.
My mummy friend is really tense lately. He always looks so wound up.
Q: Why are ghosts scared of mummies?
A: They tear up the ghost's sheets
Q: What was the pharaoh's favorite football team?
A: The Mummy Dolphins
Why didn't the mummy have any friends? Because he was too wrapped up in himself.
Q: Why was the Pharaoh boastful?
A: Because he Sphinx he's the best.
Q: Which pretty actress was an ancient Egyptian favorite?
A: Pharaoh Fawcett
Did you hear about the scary couple in prom this year? It was a mummy and his ghoul-friend.
What do you call a little monster's parents?
Mummy and Deady.
De-coffin-ated coffee is the favourite coffee of the mummy.
How did the mummy defeat Superman? He had Cryptonite.
Why did the little British boy become an Ancient Egyptian Historian?
Because he wanted his mummy to be proud him.
What did the mummy order to eat when he went to a restaurant? A wrap.
Q: Why couldn't the Pharaoh sing?
A: He hurt his larSphinx
Q: What do you say when a pharaoh doesn't pay you?
A: Egypted me! (He jipped me)
The mummy was very sore from lying down for years. So he called a Cairo-practor.
Q: How did the Pharaoh Hatshepsut know it was time to retire?
A: He saw the writing on the wall.
Q: How did the Pharaoh get to school?
A: In Anubis.
Not a lot of people know this about me, but I'm from ancient Egypt...
Those that do know call me a mummies boy.
Q: Why was the Pharaoh wet?
A: He was the reigning ruler.
Do you think that the mummies enjoyed being the mummies? Of corpse they did!
Why was Cleopatra so in love with Egypt's ruler?
Pharaohmones
What did they call mummy makers in ancient Egypt? Sarcophaguy.
Why does a mummy enjoy celebrating Christmas? As it involves a lot of gifts and wrappings.
Q: What game show did pharaohs like the most?
A: The $20,000 pyramid.