Q: What was the most important holiday in ancient Egypt?
A: Mummy's Day.
What did the mummy order to eat when he went to a restaurant? A wrap.
Did you hear about the scary couple in prom this year? It was a mummy and his ghoul-friend.
Approximately how many Egyptians can be fitted inside a pyramid? A pharaoh mount.
Q: Why are mummies such great spies?
A: They keep things under wraps
Two Pharaohs are looking for a Sarcophagus...
they walk up to the sarcophagus salesman and the first Pharaoh says "We are looking for the cheapest sarcophagus you have for sale." The salesman asks "you're not looking for a fancy one?"
The second Pharaoh says "no, we are just trying to get our mummy's worth."
You should check out that Egyptian antiquities store.
They have a mummy-back guarantee!
What do Egyptian Pharaoh's and sandwich filling have in common?
They're both in bread.
What do you yell at two mummies making out in public?
Get a tomb!
What does a mummy use when he needs to hide? Masking tape.