Damn girl, are you a magician’s assistant? Because I want you to disappear from my life.
Hey, are you an anchor? Because you've done nothing but weigh me down.
We need to cover more ground so we should split up.
It’s a good thing we’re bad at puzzles because there is no way we’re putting this shit back together.
Excuse me, I seem to have lost my phone number, can you do the same?
Let’s make like a banana and split.
Are you a New Years resolution? Because we stopped working out after the first two weeks
Aside from being single, what do you do for a living?
We must be a cast on a spiral fracture, girl. Because we’re on a serious break.
Dang girl, are you an angel? Because you are dead to me.
Girl, If you were a fruit you'd be a can't-elope.
Hey baby, are you in a tunnel? Because we’re breaking up.
Will you be the sun in my life? Then stay millions of miles away from me.
I think this has been said somewhere else.
Roses are red
Violets are blue
You made my life a mess
Please call a clean-up crew
"It's not me, it's you!"
Hey, let's hold a costume party. You can be a bank, and I can be alone!
I expected some baggage with our relationship but I didn’t expect the cargo of the Titanic to come floating to the surface.
Sorry sweety, but I think I'm in love with your mom.
Are you a dollar bill? Because you’re single.
Hey girl, are you a newspaper?
Because there's a new issue with you every f**king day.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
My divorce attorney
It’s not you – it’s me. I don’t like you anymore.
I think it would be hot if we f**ked other people. Exclusively.
I think we need to become better strangers.
Hey baby are you American cheese because you come as a single now.
The Best Break Up Lines
Want to know a joke? Our relationship.
Hey baby, I think I'm going blind. Because I can't see you anymore.
Honey if I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put the letters "DON'T LOVE" in between I and U
Hey girl, you must be a math book because you’re full of problems.
We should make like your parents and split.
Dinosaurs represent our relationship, because they both don’t exist anymore.”
Are you the dog? Because your shit’s all over the lawn.
Hey girl, are you a newspaper?
Because you get picked up by random guys on the bus.
Knock knock. Who's there? You're - You're who? - You're single!
They say one man's trash is another man's treasure. I hope you find someone who treasures you.
Roses are red, violets are blue, trash is dumped and so are you.
What’s the difference between me and your socks? I’m not yours anymore.
I don’t know what I’d do without you, but starting tomorrow I’m going to give it a try.
Are you a stop watch? Because our time is up.
Remember when I asked you out? Well, I was talking to the girl behind you.
Hey, baby. I'm calling myself Han because you need to be Solo.
You remind me of Halley's Comet. I don't wanna see you again for another 74 years.
Our relationship is like my financial status: Broke.
You looked better when I was drunk.
This relationship is kinda like the Superbowl LIII halftime show; I can’t wait for it to be over.
Roses are red
Violets are blue
But I don't care
Cause I'm leaving you.