Honey if I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put the letters "DON'T LOVE" in between I and U
You’re the girl that everybody wants. Today is their lucky day.
Roses are red
Violets are blue
Girl its been fun
But im leaving you
"There's something I've been wanting to say since the day we met - goodbye."
"I treated this relationship like my diet, one cheat day a week."
Do you happen to know sign language? Because this is the last time you’ll hear from me.
"Roses are red, Violets are blue. Garbage is dumped, now so are you."
Let’s make like a banana and split.
Remember when I asked you out? Well, I was talking to the girl behind you.
"It's not me, it's you!"
Aside from being single, what do you do for a living?
Hey, did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Because honestly, Karen, you are a demon.
Are you a dollar bill? Because you’re single.
Excuse me, I seem to have lost my phone number, can you do the same?
Did we fall from the sky? Because we look pretty broken up right now.
Raise your hand if you have a boyfriend.
Not so fast
Hey babe do you need crutches? Cause I can’t stand you anymore.
"I just can't take the bad lovemaking anymore".
What do deer doctors specialise in? Hart surgery!
"Really, our time together has just become more effort than you're worth."
Roses are red
Violets are blue
You made my life a mess
Please call a clean-up crew
"I just can't live with the pathetic tickles that you call thrusts anymore."
Honey, I need you to cancel my subscription. I’m done with your issues.
Me: Did it hurt?
Her: Did what hurt?
Me: When the door hit you in the ass on the way out.
If you take the "L" out of LOVER. Its OVER.
Dang girl, are you an angel? Because you are dead to me.
"Hey babe, you heard of the movie 'Other people?'"
"Yeah, why?"
"I think we should see it."
I expected some baggage with our relationship but I didn’t expect the cargo of the Titanic to come floating to the surface.
Knock knock. Who's there? You're - You're who? - You're single!
Boy: Want to hear a joke?
Girlfriend: Sure.
Boy: Our relationship.
Hey, remember back when we were a thing… Yeah… Good times.
It’s not you – it’s me. I don’t like you anymore.
Damn girl, are you a magician’s assistant? Because I want you to disappear from my life.
Whoa, Heaven must be missing an angel! Because you’re dead to me.
I will always cherish my initial misconceptions of you.
It's time to be like a kit-kat and split up.
Hey baby, are you in a tunnel? Because we’re breaking up.
Roses are red
Violets are blue
But I don't care
Cause I'm leaving you.
"I now pronounce you dumped and single. You may now kiss my ass."
I see my future like how the Americans spell colour. Without u.
Hey babe, how about I plan a romantic weekend get away, and while I’m gone you can pack your shit and GTFO?
"The longer we are together, the less serious I am about you."
Roses are red violets are blue sugar is sweet and so were you... but now the roses are wilted the violets are dead the sugar bowls empty and so is your head.
Can we still share a netflix account?
I think it would be hot if we f**ked other people. Exclusively.
I think we need to become better strangers.
What’s your sign? Mine is stop.
Are you a fidget spinner? Because the last time I had fun with you was forever ago and I’m not really interested in touching you anymore. I’m pretty sure you were just a phase and now I’d really like to get you out of my house and forget it ever happened.
Roses are red
And you gotta go
Because I found out
That you is a ho.
"Is it hot in here or is this relationship suffocating me?"